Queen of the dark elves. Rainbow Warrior of the world.
Friend to all... unless you piss me off!
“I find hope in the darkest of days, and focus in the brightest. I do not judge the universe.” ... unless it pisses me off!
"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of the dream. Wandering by lone sea breakers, and sitting by desolate streams. World losers and world forsakers, for whom the pale moon gleams. Yet we are the movers and the shakers of the world forever it seems.”
SOCIALISM You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbour.
COMMUNISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.
FASCISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.
NAZISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you.
BUREAUCRATISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away.
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them for a vast profit and retire on the income.
SURREALISM You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.
A FRENCH CORPORATION You have two cows. You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called 'Cowkimon' and market it worldwide.
A GERMAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
A ITALIAN CORPORATION You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You decide to have lunch.
A RUSSIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.
A SWISS CORPORATION You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them.
A CHINESE CORPORATION You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity. You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.
AN INDIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You worship them.
A BRITISH CORPORATION You have two cows. Both are mad.
AN IRAQI CORPORATION Everyone think you have lots of cows. You tell them that you have none. No-one believes you, so they bomb the crap out of you and invade your country. You still have no cows, but at least you are now a Democracy.
AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. Business seems pretty good. You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.
A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION You have two cows. The one on the left looks very attractive
*ROYAL BANK OF SCOTLAND* You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public then buys your bull
You believe that stubbies can either be worn or drunk
You think it is normal to have a Prime Minister called Kevin
You waddle when you walk due to the 53 expired petrol discount vouchers stuffed in your wallet or purse
You've made a bong out of your garden hose rather than use it for something illegal such as watering the garden
When you hear that an American 'roots for his team' you wonder how often and with whom
You understand that the phrase 'a group of women wearing black thongs' refers to footwear and is far less alluring than it sounds
You pronounce Melbourne as 'Mel-bin'
You pronounce Penrith as 'Pen-riff'
You believe the 'L' in the word 'Australia' is optional
You can translate: 'Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way to Maccas'
You believe it makes perfect sense for a nation to decorate its highways with large fibreglass bananas, prawns and sheep
You call your best friend 'a total bastard' but someone you really, truly despise is just 'a bit of a bastard'
You think 'Woolloomooloo' is a perfectly reasonable name for a place
You believe is makes sense for a country to have a $1 coin that's twice as big as its $2 coin
You understand that 'Wagga Wagga' can be abbreviated to 'Wagga' but 'Woy Woy' can't be called 'Woy'
You believe that cooked-down axlegrease makes a good breakfast spread
You believe all famous Kiwis are actually Australian, until they stuff up, at which point they again become Kiwis
You know, regardless of what the tourist books say, that no one ever says 'cobber'
You know that certain words must, by law, be shouted out during any rendition of the Angels' song 'Am I Ever Gonna See Your Face Again' and likewise during any rendition of Smokie's 'Living next door to Alice'
You believe, as an article of faith, that the confectionary known as the Wagon Wheel has become smaller with every passing year
You still don't get why the 'Labor' in 'Australian Labor Party' is not spelt with a 'U
You wear ugh boots outside the house
You believe that the more you shorten someone's name the more you like them
Whatever your linguistic skills, you find yourself able to order takeaway fluently in every Asian language
You understand that 'excuse me' can sound rude, while 'scuse me' is always polite
You know what it's like to swallow a fly, on occasions via your nose
You understand that 'you' has a plural and that it's 'youse'
You know it's not summer until the steering wheel is too hot to handle
Your biggest family argument over the summer concerned the rules of beach cricket
You react with horror when companies try to market what they call 'Anzac cookies'
When returning home from overseas, you expect to be brutally strip-searched by Customs - just in case you're trying to sneak in fruit
You believe the phrase 'smart casual' refers to a pair of black tracky-daks, suitably laundered
You understand that all train timetables are works of fiction
When working at a bar, you understand male customers will feel the need to offer an excuse whenever they order low-alcohol beer
You get choked up with emotion by the first verse of the national anthem and then have trouble remembering the second
You find yourself ignorant of nearly all the facts deemed essential in the government's new test for migrants.
You will immediately forward this list to other Australians, here and overseas, realising that only they will understand!!
It's nearly Chinese New Year's. China is crazymad with fireworks and crackers right now. The vendors are out with their fruit and veggies and strange whirley gadgets trying to raise some cash. It's illegal for them to be on the streets selling, but mostly the cops turn a blind eye. Now and then you see a raid and everyone runs with their carts yelling and laughing knowing that they will most likely get away. The cops are usually laughing too. They don't want to bust everyone and they probably buy most of their food and clothing from street vendors anyhoo. But I guess they have a high quota for Chinese New Year and they want some oranges and mandarins for their annual party, so they are out in force right now. People are getting busted for selling everything from food, clothing and kitchen appliances to DVD's. It's quite the sight to see a street raid. Sometimes they have moles planted who can send a text if the cops are coming and that usually works well, but sometimes the cops are just too fast and scream down the street in their vans nabbing everyone they can. It's been like that the last few days and it makes me a little sad. I prefer a world of trade and barter and helping out the people who work the hardest and complain the least. The street vendors are the nicest happiest people usually and I can only hope that one day we will stop supporting all the big fat rich dogs and live a little more communally making each other a little more nicer and happier too...
Although I am not American this is very interesting。 Thank you to Miss Angelina Joliee whose page I found it on。。
The meaning of the folds of the American flag! -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The first fold of our flag is a symbol of life.
The second fold is a symbol of our belief in the eternal life.
The third fold is made in honor and remembrance of the veteran departing our ranks who gave a portion of life for the defense of our country to attain a peace throughout the world.
The fourth fold represents our weaker nature, for as American citizens trusting in God, it is to Him we turn in times of peace as well as in times of war for His divine guidance.
The fifth fold is a tribute to our country, for in the words of Stephen Decatur, "Our country, in dealing with other countries, may she always be right; but it is still our country, right or wrong."
The sixth fold is for where our hearts lie. It is with our heart that we pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the republic for which it stands, one nation, under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
The seventh fold is a tribute to our Armed Forces, for it is through the Armed Forces that we protect our country and our flag against all her enemies, whether they be found within or without the boundaries of our republic.
The eighth fold is a tribute to the one who entered in to the valley of the shadow of death, that we might see the light of day, and to honor mother, for whom it flies on mother's day.
The ninth fold is a tribute to womanhood; for it has been through their faith, love, loyalty and devotion that the character of the men and women who have made this country great have been molded.
The tenth fold is a tribute to father, for he, too, has given his sons and daughters for the defense of our country since they were first born.
The eleventh fold, in the eyes of a Hebrew citizen, represents the lower portion of the seal of King David and King Solomon, and glorifies, in their eyes, the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.
The twelfth fold, in the eyes of a Christian citizen, represents an emblem of eternity and glorifies, in their eyes, God the Father, the Son, and Holy Ghost.
When the flag is completely folded, the stars are uppermost, reminding us of our national motto, "In God we Trust." Flower Warrior"♥Loverly♥"Calm
- 11 years, 5 months, 14 days ago