So valentines night I was cupid. I got myself a nice miniskirt from Primark for £8, which is going to be my new festival skirt for the summer, it's lovely in a cheap slut kind of way. I had fairy wings and army boots and painted all my bare flesh gold. I had a bow and arrow and a machine-gun-of-love (red heart for sights) for the more difficult cases. So it went down really well except when I found a girl that I quite fancied for myself. For some reason she thought I was gay! And the trouble is when anyone says that I, for some unknown reason, camp it up. So the more she called me gay, the more I protested and the camper I became. Until a girl recognised me from my profile on a dating site and assured my target that I was in fact straight. It's a funny old world!!!
Unknown "diva queen" Frisky - 16 years, 3 months ago

I did some stand up comedy last night. It was a gong show type of thing. Trouble is my comedy tends to be stories and it's not quick fire enough so I tried something a bit different. I went on stage, dropped my trousers and set my pubic hair on fire, let it burn for about 5 seconds and then smothered it out. Then I started eating raw birds eye chillis and trying to get audience members to do the same. I managed about 10 chillis but then got gonged off, thankfully, cos I was in serious discomfort. I still feel a bit queasy today. I really ought to learn some jokes!
Unknown "diva queen" Frisky - 16 years, 4 months, 1 day ago

This is an excerpt from one of the books I'm writing. Let me know what you think.

I carry on writing, occasionally looking at the sun through my eclipse viewers and taking pictures. As it gets closer and closer to the full eclipse, the quality of light takes on a sort of dusk feeling but it’s more eerie than that. It’s beautiful. It’s sunny but the sunlight is really soft, shadows become quite surreal. In some ways it’s a bit like moonlight but moonlight is much more monochrome than this. As well as the light taking on more and more of a surreal daytime twilight thing, it gets colder and colder as the moon slowly turns the sun down. It’s amazing that it makes so much difference, it’s like clouds, I always find that amazing, that the radiation from the sun travels 93,000,000 miles across the universe, barrelling along like a train along a track, and I mean a real train, like a French train or the Japanese Bullet, not the pathetic Transpennine express, which is more of a glorified tram – what ever happened to our railways? We invented the damn things and once had the best railways in the world, now look at the state of them, Isombard Kingdom Brunel must be turning in his grave. Anyway, there’s the radiation from the sun barrelling along like a bullet train and it’s done 92,999,999½ miles and it hits a cloud and pfuh! That’s it, completely takes the wind out of it’s sails. I know I said a train but the cloud turns it into a dinghy with a limp lifeless sail and it limps to earth using oars that rattle around the oarlocks like teaspoon in a mug. And what’s a cloud? Steam. That’s all, just a bit of steam. 93,000,000 miles only to be tripped up by steam. Steam! The sun can peel your skin right off, from 93,000,000 miles! It knocked Icarus out of the sky, from 93,000,000 miles! It can be turned into electricity, heat tarmac so you can’t touch it, cook a dog in a car and create thermals you can float a glider on all day – with 2 people inside, but a cloud. Steam. Then it’s all over. And clouds are the absolute bane of eclipse hunters, as they call themselves. I found the eclipse ever so easy to ‘hunt’ as it happened, I looked on the internet, saw where it was going, booked a flight to a suitable airport and, well, you know the rest, you just read it, and if you didn’t just read it, if you’ve flipped this open in a bookshop for a quick browse, carry it over to the till, pay the checkout person and take it home and read it – especially if you’re doing this in a charity shop, what on earth is one of my books doing in a charity shop, rescue me, quickly, and put me on your shelf between James Joyce and Salman Rushdie and all the other books you have on your shelf to make you look well read. And if someone comes round and says oh, you read Joseph Peace, is he any good, you can lend this to them but write your name inside the front cover so they remember where to return it to when they find it under their sofa when they move house, otherwise I’ll end up back here amongst all this horrible Mills and Boon rubbish. Oh, and if you’re looking for Mills and Boon and picked me up by mistake, put me down and move on, I’m far too high brow for you.
Unknown "diva queen" Frisky - 16 years, 4 months, 17 days ago

Happy New Year everyone. I had a random time as I was jumping through a fire on my bike in the car park of a curry house in Hyde wearing just a sequinned thong just before midnight! I then drank a bit and slept in my car and packed my stuff away today and went home to have my breakfast at 3.30pm!!!
Unknown "diva queen" Frisky - 16 years, 4 months, 22 days ago