Within my head I often dream of things that cannot be,
Of things that are restricted or at least with-held from me.
For reasons which seem so unfair as to cause a longing pain,
It hurts the very soul within when there’s nothing left to gain.
I often feel like life’s amiss and I no longer care,
For all the things that make me laugh or to my conscience tear.
I often feel that somewhere deep within my messed up brain,
There should be a switch, like for a light to switch off all the pain.
But as it goes that isn’t so nor will it ever be,
So I must learn to stand the shit that is my cost-y fee.
The torment, pain and anger that builds up from within,
And causes me to lash out at each and everything.
‘There has to be a cause’ I tell myself each day,
And my mind turns round and kicks my ass without distraction or delay.
Cos we both know that I know where the reasons lie,
But we both know that I know, I’ll still try to deny
Those feelings that touch close to me, and pierce my beating heart.
Theres one side pushing this way, The others pushing out.
Two forces lay in combat, fighting for their side,
And I’m stuck in the middle, almost hoping that I die.
These sleepless nights cannot go on, but what is there to do?
I know no longer what I want, carry on or start anew?
Each has its benefits, its disasters, and its woe,
But unless I try out each of them, how am I supposed to know?
But damn I’ve reached a wall made up of rock and brick,
There’s only one that I can choose for both I cannot pick.
So whilst im working on this prob, no doubt with lack of luck,
SOMEONE slap me round the face, “Cheer up, you moody Fuck.”
Please...?
Jon "my Jon♥" Annoyed
- 16 years, 4 months, 4 days ago