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Unknown
Unknown owns this human at 12600 points.
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Unknown
"ponny tail"



Name:
Unknown, 38/Male
Last login: over 3 weeks ago
Local time:12:37 AM
Join date:16 years, 4 months, 11 days ago
Location: Plymouth United Kingdom

"One Vision, One Purpose"
About me:
“A man does what he can, Until his destiny is revealed to him.” I know it's a movie quote but it suits me so well, At least I think so anyway. All I ever do is try to do what I can, I don't know what life holds in store for me but I have an unexplainable feeling that I am meant for something important. I've always been a bit of a lone wolf. I've always preferred the company of a select few like-minded individuals over a large group of people who have conflicting personalities, values, and ideals. I'm rather opinionated, but that's not to say my opinion can't be corrected. I am 100% willing to admit when I'm wrong, it's just so happens that I usually don't bother speaking if I'm unsure about what I'm talking about. I find it very difficult to find people who share my outlook on the world, people and life in general. I'm quite a complicated person and I'm difficult to understand sometimes, which is why my words often get misunderstood, misinterpreted, mangled up, and spat back in my face most of the time. I can express myself much more eloquently in text that I can in speech. I'm very easy to annoy, mostly because I refuse to stop caring about the little things like manners, etiqette, and general pleasantries, I believe it's important to be polite, speak to people a proper manner, and be generally nice to people. Unfortunately because most people don't seem to care about those things any more I've had to toughen up and I'm only really polite and courteous to those who treat me with the respect and consideration that I deserve as a human being with feelings and a heart. If I'm not respected I have a habit of not giving a shit about what I say to the person or how I act around them, I'm not exactly proud of it but what goes around comes around and I'm not letting anyone walk all over me. So this is my page, enjoy reading it and contact me if you like, I'm happy to talk to you as long as you're not a complete retard.
About you:
Looking for: Friendship and dating
Orientation: Straight
Herds: Human Pets Anonymous, 4chan, THUMBERS ANONYMOUS, Thumbers Anonymous *~! xxx, Newbies helping Newbies

Unknown
Unknown
"posers"
900 pts
Unknown's tales
Unknown
I went out drinking after work on Wednesday. Started with some friends of mine who attend a drama group that I am a member of. Started ok, just talking and laughing as you would usually do. But once again I started drinking way too much too quickly and even though I didn't realize it myself, I had become far too drunk and I was nothing but a laughing stock. Not only that but because I couldn't stop I decided to go out on my own to some clubs and pubs in the city centre afterwards, and this was at about midnight. I was out, making more of a fool out of myself, until about 5 am when the places started closing. I walked home and went to bed at about 6, I then got up at 8 to go to work. I only had about an hours sleep so I was still a bit drunk when I went to work.

Whilst at work, sometime in the afternoon, one of my most valued friends approached me and explained to me that she was worried about me and it opened my eyes to how foolish I've been. I knew I wasn't being smart but the only reason I've been going out so late is because I'm lonely and I was to meet more people and make friends. But I've been going about it the wrong way.

I need to be more in control of myself and drinking way too much isn't going to help me with that. I need to stop going out at stupid times and staying out all night. I hope I can do something about it.
Unknown "ponny tail" Naughty - 16 years, 3 months, 24 days ago
Unknown
I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, and if anything I've just become very confused about a lot of things, and apathetic about others.

I'll begin with reflecting on my actions over the past week. I seem to have a talent for pissing other people off and pushing them away from me. Last week I lashed out at a couple people on a web forum that I'm a member of and at the time I believed that my actions were justified,. I'm still a bit peeved at how I was spoken to by those people, but in retrospect I did overreact quite a lot. The reason for my sudden being the fact that I was once again being spoken to by those people as if I was inferior to them, I was being spoken down to. I have yet to find anything that enrages me more than that.
After thinking about it I've also realised that I was also feeling immense frustration over the fact that nobody thought to say “Don't speak to him like that.” or “Have some respect for your fellow man.” such things as that. Although at the time I didn't know exactly what I was feeling, and explained my feelings very vaguely. I said “I never get any support.” and “I never get listened to” this was misunderstood by the others, who thought I meant my thoughts and feelings regarding the group I'm in never get any consideration, which is wrong because I had previously influenced change in the group through expressing my thoughts and feelings. I made some enemies through expressing them and I'm not really proud of that. It's clear to me that the people who became my “enemies” would never actually admit it publicly. This also bothered me and contributed to my rage and frustration.

This is where I begin to second guess myself, I ask myself, “Do they really need to admit it publicly?” “Was I wrong to be so angry?” Which also brings me to doubt my whole being and question my values and beliefs. This is because I try to only act on what I feel is right. I'm true to my thoughts and feelings and I believe it is a good thing to be honest with such things.

Another recent incident which had me thinking about a lot of things, mostly friendship, happened roughly two weeks ago. I was at a gig with a friend of mine, It was an Irish folk band so there was a large crowd of people dancing and jumping around in close proximity to one another. I thought I would give it a try seeing as I didn't at the previous gig. So I did try, and I was enjoying it to begin with, when there was more room, but it got to the point where I could hardly move and I was being pushed into other people by the group. My friend told me just to push back, but I'm really not a very physical person and I don't find being pushed and pushing other people enjoyable at all. So due to that I was already a bit ticked off. Eventually I found myself in a comfortable spot and I was happy there but it seemed my friend was getting a little bored with just jumping around, he wanted to link arms with someone and go around the entire crowd and make his way back to where he started again.
I didn't realise he wanted to link arms with me. A few minutes passed and he told me to do a funny cockney dance because I was wearing a waistcoat (which I had already done once in the night just for a laugh), but I really didn't want to do it whilst in the midst of this mass of people. Unfortunately I wasn't very clear about that and my friend didn't understand. After a while he asked me to link arms (this is when I realised he meant he wanted to go around the crowd with me), and because of everything that had happened up until then, I was very frustrated and I lashed out at him. I swore at him and of course he didn't like that so he got angry with me and told me I was being a wanker. I don't know if he realised it but as he was telling me so he had an extremely smug look on his face, which at the time just annoyed me even more because it felt like he was looking down on me. I swore at him again and walked away to sit down.
I had enough time to think about what had happened, but I childishly sent a text to another friend we were with on that night, and I regret doing that. Eventually my friend came over to where I was sitting and sat down next to me. We had a hurried discussion, which was mostly him telling me how I'm being stupid. I apologised for swearing at him and after a while he apologised for calling me a wanker.

That particular incident also had me questioning myself and my integrity. Was I wrong to feel so frustrated about it? I had never been in an Irish folk gig and danced within a crowd whilst sober before. I had no idea if I would like it or not, so I gave it a try and now I know I don't like it. But I can't help but wonder, maybe I'm making all these excuses up. Am I just trying to accommodate my actions? Are these the real reasons for my behaviour and attitude? I just don't know.

Thirdly, something else which has confused me a lot this year has been a very brief relationship I had with a girl I hardly knew, I'd met her before but I had hardly ever spoken to her or got to know her. It's a long story but I'll try and summarise it.
During the week of New Years '07, I was quite open about my relationship status, and there was a girl hanging out with me and some other members of the group that I'm a member of, the same group as previously mentioned in this note. After a couple nights of hanging out at bars and general socialising I noticed she was sending me certain signals. I wasn't sure what to do at the time but I thought that it couldn't be a bad thing. So I hung out with her during the day of New Years Eve. She seemed like a nice enough person, and she was. She didn't have a malicious bone in her body, but she was naïve, and I'll get to that in a moment. We spent New Years Eve together in a pub with a group of friends and we had a good laugh, it was a good night and everyone had fun. We went from a pub on Mutley Plain to the Plymouth Hoe, and then from there to a friends house where we watched Family Guy all night.
Me and the girl in question left our friends house in the early hours of the morning and went back to my place, we were going to watch Anime, but somehow we ended up making out. Which was fine, nothing wrong with that. A couple days later she had to get the train back to Uni, she didn't want anybody seeing her off so she left alone.
We spoke over MSN and Telephone quite a lot over the next month, we had a good laugh, and kept telling each other how much we missed each other, which at the time I felt like I did. Soon, completely of her volition, she decided to come back to Plymouth to visit during her reading week, without telling her parents. She stayed at her friends house (the same friends house that we watched Family Guy all night at) for the week. I didn't want to get in the way of her studies but she seemed to just let me get in the way most of the time during that week. We watched loads of Ghibli movies that week, which was great because I had hardly seen any of them up until that point.
To get to the point, during that week, we slept together, I think things would've gone much smoother had we not been constantly in each others company. As the week drew to a close I began to realise that she wasn't the person I thought she was. Still a perfectly nice girl, but naïve and if I dare say, rather self absorbed. On the Friday night of that week she received a text from someone and immediately insisted that she be given the keys to the apartment so she can go have a “crying fit.” Myself and our friend tried to convince her to stay but she wouldn't yield. She left in a hurry and I was left not knowing what on earth to do, I began to ask myself, “What kind of boyfriend lets his girlfriend go off to cry in the middle of the night alone, in fact what kind of Man does that to anybody?” So I gathered up my courage and put my coat on and went after her. I found her on the seafront on the phone to somebody, sure she was crying, sort of. But it wasn't really a fit. I had absolutely no idea what to do, I didn't want to surprise her or interrupt her phone call because I respected her privac
Unknown "ponny tail" Naughty - 16 years, 3 months, 29 days ago
Comments

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snaZzy
i thmbd 2 :))
snaZzy "TheAngeLicWitch" Confused - 16 years, 2 months, 29 days ago
Meow
Especially for a good chat and nice cup of tea.
http://humanpets.com...♥~Queenie~♥
You have been given ღAlways Welcome At the Palace.
Crafted by Meow
Meow - 16 years, 3 months, 1 day ago
Meow
You seem to have alot of issues. Hmmm~
Meow - 16 years, 3 months, 1 day ago
Meow
Thumbed your tales. And drink less if you can. :)
Meow - 16 years, 3 months, 1 day ago
Morrighan

You have been given Play Time.
Crafted by Bruce
Morrighan "MeTal Queen" In the mood for a ride :X - 16 years, 3 months, 2 days ago
M A Y M A Y
gotcha back!!!
M A Y M A Y GoodBye HP - 16 years, 3 months, 2 days ago
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