What a worthless afternoon on HP. Last day I can be on for at least a week and nobody's on.
Unknown "poetic" Naughty - 15 years, 8 months ago

So my barber’s name is Ed. He’s been raising his prices for haircuts so I decided to go someplace cheaper. I’ve heard of these salons full of beautiful women cutting hair. I thought, “I’d love to have some hot chick rubbing her hands all over my head, pressing her body into mine.” But salons are expensive, so I go to the salon SCHOOL. $9. Cut and shampoo. They let me walk-in and I got this girl named Fusion. I’m decked out in camoflage so I’m totally out of place in this salon full of gorgeous blonde women who are now all staring at me as I walk past them.

I don’t think Fusion has ever cut a man’s hair. It took her nearly an hour. She wore a pink necktie and used a fluorescent yellow comb. Kinky. The whole time I’m thinking, " Mmmmmmmm this feels good" and slightly pressing into her, but then I stop and I think “I’m not totally sure Fusion is really a girl.” I think it’s a transvestite. It finally got done and she was gonna shampoo me, which would’ve been totally hot had I been totally sure that she had female parts so I told her not to and I left. I still don’t know if it was worth the $3 that I saved.

Unknown "poetic" Naughty - 15 years, 11 months, 5 days ago

DVD's.......SUCK!!! Who was the freakin' moron who invented these things. I've defecated better things than this crappy form of media. What the hell?!? I can't remember the last dvd i watched that didn't skip or just completely freeze up because of some minor imperfection on the disc. You have to completely live in a vacuum and wear white gloves in order to handle the stupid things. Can't we please go back to VHS?
Unknown "poetic" Naughty - 15 years, 11 months, 9 days ago

Ok, maybe i'm a little obsessive about bathrooms. But does no one care about bathroom privacy? Who designs these things so carelessly? Our new office building - you open the door to the restroom and straight ahead is the handicap stall. So, right when i walk in the room, i'm staring at a guy through the ginormous crack in the stall and....it's just disgusting. Is it that expensive to make real walls and real doors for bathroom stalls? The sinks are opposite the other stalls, so now, when i'm washing my hands i have to divert my eyes from the mirror so as not to look at the guy taking a dump behind me. ridiculous.
Unknown "poetic" Naughty - 16 years, 6 days ago

The woods are scary at night when you're alone. I was hunting coons one night. I had dripped oyster "juice" on my boots to disguise my scent and walked to my spot. I laid on the ground and waited for the coons to show up at my bait. Not long after, I felt something licking and pressing against the bottom of my shoe. By the time I turned around, it was gone.
Unknown "poetic" Naughty - 16 years, 22 days ago