Aslak the Viking looked over the vast expanse of high-end retail units spread out below him. He smiled at his kingdom and felt at peace.
‘Oi Arselick! You were 4 minuets late for work this morning. If it happens again you are on report Sunny Jim,’ Called Martin the Supervisor, over the radio.
‘The unwise man is awake all night worries over and again. When morning rise he is restless still, his burden as before.’ Replied Aslak.
Up in the Security Control Centre Martin rolled his eyes.
Later on petrol Aslik spotted a group of youths attempting to break into the Candy King Sweet stand, which was set in a camera black spot and easy pray for the young villains.
‘Cattle die kinsmen die all men are mortal. Words of praise will never perish
nor a noble name.’ Aslik called to them.
‘F@ck off you old c@nt. You can’t touch us! We know the law! You can’t do nothing!’ The youths called back. One mooned Aslik and then they started to chant….
‘PEDO PEDO PEDO.’ At him.
At lunch Aslik enjoyed a Burger King and a cookie from the Cookie Shack on level 2. The cookie had been free! Aslik suspected that the girl behind the counter was impressed with his mighty helmet.
‘Always rise to an early meal, but eat your fill before a feast. If you're hungry you have no time to talk at the table.’ He said to himself as he rubbed his full tummy through his thick fur shirt.
While holding a smack-head shoplifter in an arm lock, Aslik, prompted by his cries of…
‘Ow OW! Man your breaking my arm! Leave off it, you can’t do this, my kids waiting for me. You can’t do this to my kid man.’
Said.
‘Moderately wise a man should be not too crafty or clever. A learned man's heart whose learning is deep seldom sings with joy.’
‘I’m gonna f@ck you up man. I’m coming back to wet you up after work. Me and my mates are gonna stab your ass you f@cking poof.’ And then he spat onto Aslik’s mighty fur boots.
At 8 pm, Aslik locked the centres doors, took the keys back to control, popped his radio onto charge and signed himself out on the Day Book.
‘You wanna come down the gym and bust some reps?’ Asked Big Pete.
‘Go you must. No guest shall stay in one place forever. Love will be lost
if you sit too long at a friend's fire.’ He quipped back.
‘Whatever nutter.’ Said Big Pete.
Come 9 pm Aslik was to be found sitting in front of the telly. Beer in hand, polishing his double-headed axe and watching Relocation Relocation. A young couple, he in Management Training and her something in PR, were looking to move out of London and into a quiet village location near the M4. The pretty little village caught Aslik’s attention.
‘I’d pillage the shit out of that.’ He said to himself.
When the program was done he had a warm milk and went to bed.
Capt James Brooke "C J "
- 15 years, 1 month, 10 days ago
