I just wanted to say thank you again for all the kind messages, and comments, I really appreciate the support and understanding. I just want to let you know even though I am not responding much to messages and Comments I am reading all of them and I will get back to you. All the kind words have been really helping me and I am really grateful. Thank you. 😘
Mystik Rave Calm - 7 years, 7 months ago

Hey everyone, sorry I'm so dead these days. It's been a really busy and rough time. Last weekend I worked as a vendor at the Ottawa Geek Market and today/yesterday given it's 3am right now... was my brother's funeral. The service was beautiful and you could really feel the love for him in the room, there wasn't a dry eye. He touched a lot of people's lives and everyone who'd meet him would instantly love him. No one can ever replace him and I will miss him everyday. I love you Chris, I miss you. :(
Mystik Rave Calm - 7 years, 7 months, 1 day ago

I wanna thank everyone for their love, support and concern. Things are getting better, I finally got info out of people and date was changed so I can go. It's been really hard as we were really close and miss him to pieces.

I also want to say as dark as things get suicide is never the answer I know i people hear that every day and it takes so much strength to keep going especially when it looks like things are never going to get better. I say this as someone who has walked the path, as someone who years ago attempted to take my own life. It failed, and I'm grateful I failed especially now I know the pain I would have inflicted on loved ones if I had died that day.

I have bipolar disorder, it's not something like to talk about cause of the stigma around mental health. I am medicated and stable but it's still a battle. It really doesn't take the pain away from you, it just passes the pain to the people you love and I know that is not something I would ever want to do no matter how dark it gets for me, I know I will find the light again eventually during the time I relapse and fall.

You can think of some mental health conditions like a cancer (for a lack of a better comparison) There are good days and there is bad; you can be fine for a really long time and relapse and another episode starts. The fight begins again. It's a battle. It's an illness like any other. People with mental illnesses need as much love and support and to not be treated like they are crazy and no one. That is the worst thing someone could do.

Depression is a serious thing and can be fatal like cancer if left untreated and the person is left alone without help. If you suspect someone you know is having a hard time don't judge them, support them instead. You could save a life.
Mystik Rave Calm - 7 years, 8 months, 4 days ago

It has been a very hard few days, I am an emotional wreck. A close family member of mine killed himself a few days ago and got notified by detectives. I then had the difficult task of notifying our other family members. Since then they have taken over planning the funeral arrangements, shut me out of planning it, even made it for the one weekend they know I couldn't attend it. I am feeling so broken and betrayed and been crying for days. To add insult to injury I found out over social media the date of the service. I fell like I should have said nothing to all to them.

Got to love family, eh? #&$%! ...
Mystik Rave Calm - 7 years, 8 months, 9 days ago

Hi everyone, sorry been so quiet. I've been very busy as of late. I spent a week south of the Canadian boarder in the USA. The photo was taken in Chicago from the Skydeck at the Willis Tower (formally Sears Tower).
Mystik Rave Calm - 7 years, 8 months, 16 days ago