Something I just wrote... not sure if it's quite finished and I don't have a title but I felt the need to write it and since I haven't written really in about 6 months it felt good to write something.

Ripping away
Tearing at the flesh
The soft undertones
Leaving me bloody
On the floor
Beaten and alone
Gently dying
A silent breath

Inhaled rage
Not ready to go
The anger escapes
Ready to fight
For me, my life
Pushing back
Running and escaping
Bursting into freedom

Away from tyranny
From the hate
That seethes beneath
Flying into the darkness
The safe unknown
Its encompassing chill
Warm to my skin
After the icy venom
Of passionate scorn

Obscured fate
Looming before me
A brick wall
Of treacherous uncertainty
Reaching out
For something familiar
To slow the decent
Into the madness
Of my reality
Princess Cass "My favourite" Ecstatic - 16 years, 3 months, 15 days ago

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Princess Cass "My favourite" Ecstatic - 16 years, 4 months, 5 days ago

In my life, I have been in many abusive relationships. The first time I was married, he turned out to be abusive in every way possible... emotionally, verbally, physically and sexually. The scars I still wear from that relationship will probably be with me for life. I still occationally experience flashbacks and nightmares of the things he did or that I feared he would do to me. This is a poem I wrote one night after a particularly horrifying flashback.

Not This Time
The lies that bind,
The heart that weeps,
The tear that falls,
The fear that sleeps.

Deep within me,
The silence roars,
My body trembles,
My heartbeat soars.

The memories surface,
My heart skips a few beats,
I can feel his fist again,
Reality retreats.

I'm back in his rule,
Will this be my fate?
No love in his eyes,
Nothing but hate.

I reach for help,
I want back in the light,
He can't have me again,
This time I will fight.

Princess Cass "My favourite" Ecstatic - 16 years, 6 months, 15 days ago

I found this rather interesting:
You scored 79% in romance and 86% in BDSM interest!
BDSM activites, fantasies, and interests are as personal as anything else in the realm of human sexuality. I hope that this test has given you a sense of your interest in integrating your desire to engage in BDSM into a long-term, loving relationship. For some people, this is essential. Other people are just as happy with "play partners" with whom they can engage in BDSM activities but do so without the real emotional attachment of a long-term, loving relationship. A high score in BDSM indicates a demonstrable interest including experience and a desire to engage in these activities in the future. A high score in romance shows that not only do you hope to be in a long-term relationship, but it would ideally be one in which the caring that you have for your lover results in flexibility on your part and a willingness to learn of the interests of this special person in an open and non-judgmental way. This may both enhance the relationship by bringing the two of you closer and help to keep an erotic charge for a long time to come. If you get a warm feeling when you think of such a future, you are a romantic.

Your Score: The Assertive Sub
You scored 64
You are assertive, yet still maintain some level of submission. You stand your ground firmly most of the time, and are fairly level. You may not identify with being submissive or dominant, and it's possible that you're a switch (someone who alternates between the two depending on circumstances and/or mood).
Princess Cass "My favourite" Ecstatic - 16 years, 11 months, 14 days ago

Falling

Trapped in fear
Scared to trust
Unable to hold back
Falling into the unknown
The darkness envelops
Reaching out
To stop my freefall
I feel nothing
Only blackness
Pain lies in wait
Ready to pounce
Happiness out of grasp
I want to fall into you
Into your waiting arms
Exposed before you
Naked and scared
Pull me close
Wrap me in love
Release me from fear

Princess Cass "My favourite" Ecstatic - 16 years, 11 months, 14 days ago