LIFE AS A GLITCH IN CODING IV
"No Matter What"
Is tomorrow really a new day?
Then I’ll be in a fuck of a hurry
Rushing around to pack as many joys and pretzels into
An empty life, for life till we part
A stomach in a state of rot
Another new day, too many of these
New days, new lives and second chances.
That’s not really what I need, I spend far too much time waiting for this bus.
Learning to let my love die, to keep hope
Learning to walk without joy
Every drunken night no longer a rush to pack as many hollow excitements into one night,
I have to be smarter than that now.
I have to be able to look my situation and character in it’s face.
To become something I can appreciate.
I’m not a gut to be filled, though I love feeling full
I have to be too many blank pages
An empty frame
Useful only in due time
Everything I’ve seen in you has made me no use for someone else
Left stains in my eyes, strains till it dies
Watching the sunrise, fuck watching anything with you
So you can revel in its beauty beside me,
Put on your fishnets, eyeliner and leave.
And now I’m living out reruns,
I’ve begun to feel the future, unwise yet all too promising;
She wants to be you so she wants to fuck me
Put her hair up, strap on the heels and leave
Everyday a flashback
Every bitch a knock off of you
Wanting to be the next to see me fall, but I said I would not,
And they cry when I don’t.
Any way, any time of day it’s only one way
We can only aspire to crash and burn harder
Smarter with every breath
Quicker with every step
Knowing we’re only set to ash out more efficiently
Carried to the last door only on reserves
All of this an excersize in pessimism
But can we not leave these lines behind us?
This lethargia…
Giving up everyday,
Everyday, giving up is hardly even worth my while anymore,
so I give up on the process of giving up entirely,
as well as epiphany and rebirth
chrysalis?
NOT a butterfly!!! But a moth
With no colour to protect me
Transforming into something easier to spot to kill,
No longer crawling safely across risk free nothing but chewing on sticks
And I foolishly gravitate towards this light all the same
We moths are both careless and easily entertained,
Well,
Siren told me I will chase any light with black hair
And that is just foolish and selfish of me,
Dangerous and desperate.
Callous and noncommittal,
Eyes going too many ways at once.
Too many fucking lights on in here.
I can find my way to the fridge
Yet once inside, the light dies out...
I HAVE BEEN FUCKING TRICKED!!!
Being selfish again…
Black hair and horns
Feeling self destructive,
Feeling fuckin GROOVY.
I’m dried out and she’s FRESH.
Drawn to flesh out of stress
I’m dried out and she’s WET.
Drown out the words I’m slurring in protest.
And I’m not ready to taste that sour mind of hers
I plan every move out knowing she’s The 12 Steps to Suicide
Flashing me that grin for my time.
Keep dreaming of one, and yet there are a million others
Acquisition, turning all those dreams into nightmares.
Covered in sweat, waking in states of panic
Even my sleep will bring me stress
Keep dreaming,
And there are a million others.
Unknown "Hotdog Inspektor" Sexy
- 16 years, 7 months, 17 days ago