Just another random call
Come morning it'll mean nothing at all
Hands shaking, heart breaking
Desperately craving some inner peace
Best I can get is some hollow release
Baby let me taste your mouth one last time,
Let me remember what it was like when you were mine
Gone too fast, but never far enough
Time makes it all better, so why the hell is it still so tough?
Just another random call,
Come morning it'll mean nothing at all...
Unknown "proteger NFS" Inspired - 16 years, 2 months, 20 days ago

After admitting that I'm happy to spend most of my days cooking, baking, sewing, crafting, & gardening a friend of mine commented to me that I sounded like a housewife, and I have to wonder: What's so bad about that??
It's not that I don't like parties, drinking, & trips it's just that for the majority of my days I'm happy enriching the lives of those I care about through the above ways.
I LIKE to try out different recipes, and I admit it, I get excited about cookie cutters and all the different foods I can make "fun" to eat by using them.
I feel a huge sense of personal satisfaction from sewing dress up clothes for my child instead of buying them.
I grin from ear to ear after picking fresh chives from my mini garden to use in a meal, knowing that I've grown them.
Don't get me wrong it's not that I'm lazy or shirking my obligation to provide a financially stable life for my child. In fact I love what I went to college for, I just don't see working 40hours a week outside of the home as desirable for me personally.
And it's not that I'm bashing anyone that does! I just feel like women fought so hard to "get out of the kitchen" that those of us that would be quite emotionally satisfied and fullfilled from that type of lifestyle are no longer able to say so without strange looks. As if to say "Don't you want more from life than that?!?" And my answer is: "It seems to me like most people want to fill up their lives with thrills & excitement, but I get a thrill when my son tells me "Thanks momma it was deeeelishious" with a big grin. I DO get excited when I sew a skirt and it comes out exactly as I pictured it. I DO feel happy when someone I care about smiles at me and says "Your a great friend lady, thanks" or is touched by a small gesture I've done on their behalf. If I'm happy with the "housewife" style of life, why do I have to want more than it???"
Some days I feel like a very old soul in a new body, not quite sure how to fit into this "modern" world with all of it's "conveniences" that tend to leave people with tons of time that ends up being filled with feeling disatisfied and unconnected with those they love and with the Earth.
Unknown "proteger NFS" Inspired - 16 years, 5 months, 10 days ago

Something slightly different from my usual tales but I had to share :-)....

Now I fully admit that I'm not that experienced at home repairs/improvements, but I'll give anything a good try, so I tried to put up shelves in my 3yr old son's room yesterday and unfortunatly for whatever reason I couldn't get them to stay in the wall. I tried 4 times, and no matter what I did to them as soon as I'd even GENTLY pull on them they'd come out of the wall. Obviously NOT safe for my son who tries to hang off of everything as many already know lol.
I was sweating and frustrated and okay I admit pouting a bit cause I was trying so hard and my son was watching me the whole time.
I turned to him and told him I was sorry but I couldn't get them to stay in the wall safely for him and that I'd have to get someone else with more knowledge of these things to help me.
He then said to me "That's okay momma, you tried, that's all we can do, don't be sad you make my life nice in other ways."

I was so touched that I had to share :-)

Unknown "proteger NFS" Inspired - 16 years, 5 months, 17 days ago

The wind whips my hair about as the rain pours down against my body, renewing me...reviving me, setting my skin awash in sensation. The soaked grass lending a hint of graceful flow to my almost primal dancing amidst the forceful storm, and I imagine your seductive voice calling out to me as I spin about. I can feel a whisper against my skin, wind or a phantom touch I refuse to let logic disconcern which it is, for in this moment I could swear I feel you walking up behind me, your hands about my waist as you steady me to stop me from falling when your sure touch startles me out of my reverie. I feel them encircling my waist as you pull my back tight against your front. One hand leaving my waist to guide my head to the side, the slick skin of my neck bare until your own head bows down to trace the rain drops falling upon it with your tongue. Your other hand sliding up past my stomach... I gasp at the duality of your touch and the rain against my skin. Masterfully you guide me towards the porch swing, and pull me atop of you, never stopping your sinfully torturous explorations of my body. I marvel at the feel of your own rain soaked skin as I try to incite the same passionate daze you've wrought upon my senses. Wanting to taste every inch of your bare skin I slide down to my knees and trace your legs and beyond with my lips and tongue, nipping, caressing, savoring each spot that has you emitting moans of pleasure......

Unknown "proteger NFS" Inspired - 16 years, 5 months, 23 days ago

The forest is awash in fragrant hues of green, alive it whispers to me to let loose, let go and breathe deeply of it’s secrets as I spin about the fire watching the crackling flames dance higher than even my desire for you. Watching as they hiss and sway their way up to the moon and stars as I take that first awkward step towards you, my chest heaving, palms sweating as trembling fingers reach out to touch your cheek and gain your attention. Bewildered eyes meet mine as my heart pounds wildly and I lean in mustering up all the courage I possess to make such a bold move towards your lush lips…my eventual paradise.
A startled gasp emits as you realize my intent. A slight shake of your head tells me no, and the blush upon my cheeks will surely stain them forever with it’s intensity. Until I see the gleam in your half smile as you tilt your head towards the path that’s lead me here. I reach past you with jerky movements towards the bottle of red wine, gleaming darkly against the backdrop of inky night. Tilting it to my lips I drink as I try to compose myself. An infinite moment passes as the rich taste couples with the fire blazing both beside me and inside me to heat me even more. And I realize what you can already see, that with just one light brush of your hand against any part of my body right now would have me screaming my release, and I’m thankful that you understand my desire better than I as you watch me walk barefoot along the damp forest floor to where no one else will see me come undone.
I lay arms spread against the cool grass hoping it’ll ground me enough to let me be able to breathe fully while I wait. “What a tempting picture you make laying at my feet” startled by your words I gasp as I raise my head. “NO, I haven’t told you to get up yet have I?” I feel more coolness seeping into my skin as I quickly shake my head no against the ground. “You learn fast, that’ll help” is your only response, and rapidly I learn to only do as you say, it’s so much better that way. And as you use a pocket knife to cut away the buttons on my dress, stating that I'm not to cover myself infront of you in between nipping along the way, just hard enough to set my over sensitive skin awash with sensation……..

Unknown "proteger NFS" Inspired - 16 years, 6 months, 7 days ago