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Unknown
Unknown owns this human at 16293 points.
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Unknown
"throw up butt"



Name:
Unknown
Last login: over 3 weeks ago
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Herds: Truth or Dare
Growling
Unknown
Unknown
"Battle Scar Butt"
52500 pts
Unknown's tales
Unknown
Recently I overheard a mother and daughter in their last moments together at the airport. They had announced the departure.

Standing near the security gate, they hugged and the mother said, 'I love you and I wish you enough'.

The daughter replied, 'Mom, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Mom'.

They kissed and the daughter left. The mother walked over to the window where I was seated. Standing there I could see she wanted and needed to cry. I tried not to intrude on her privacy but she welcomed me in by asking, 'Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?'.


Yes, I have,' I replied. 'Forgive me for asking,

but why is this a forever good-bye?'.

'I am old and she lives so far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is - the next trip back will be for my funeral,' she said.


'When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, 'I wish you enough'. May I ask what that means?'.



She began to smile. 'That's a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone'.. She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail and she smiled even more. 'When we said , 'I wish you enough', we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them'. Then turning toward me, she shared the following as if she were reciting it from memory.


I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright no matter how gray the day may appear.

I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun even more.



I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive and everlasting.

I wish you enough pain so that even the smallest of joys in life may appear bigger.



I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.

I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.


I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye.

She then began to cry and walked away.

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them but then an entire life to forget them.
Unknown "throw up butt" Playful - 16 years, 3 months, 1 day ago
Unknown
The Lost Dr. Seuss Poem:

I Love My Job


I love my job, I love the pay!
I love it more and more each day.
I love my boss, he is the best!
I love his boss and all the rest.

I love my office and its location, I hate to have to go on vacation.
I love my furniture, drab and grey, and piles of paper that grow each day!
I think my job is really swell, there's nothing else I love so well.
I love to work among my peers, I love their leers, and jeers, and sneers.
I love my computer and its software;
I hug it often though it won't care. I love each program and every file.
I'd love them more if they worked awhile.

I'm happy to be here. I am. I am.
I'm the happiest slave of the firm, I am.
I love this work, I love these chores.
I love the meetings with deadly bores.
I love my job - I'll say it again - I even love those friendly men.
Those friendly men who've come today,
in clean white coats to take me away!!
Unknown "throw up butt" Playful - 16 years, 3 months, 1 day ago
Unknown
Some rose-colored glasses for viewing the world ;)


I AM THANKFUL FOR THE WIFE WHO SAYS Its HOT DOGS TONIGHT, BECAUSE SHE IS HOME WITH ME, AND NOT OUT
WITH SOMEONE ELSE.

FOR THE HUSBAND WHO IS ON THE SOFA BEING A COUCH POTATO, BECAUSE HE IS HOME WITH ME AND NOT OUT AT THE BARS.

FOR THE TEENAGER WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT DOING DISHES BECAUSE IT MEANS SHE IS AT HOME, NOT
ON THE STREETS.

FOR THE TAXES I PAY BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM EMPLOYED .

FOR THE MESS TO CLEAN AFTER A PARTY BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS.

FOR THE CLOTHES THAT FIT A LITTLE TOO SNUG BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE ENOUGH TO EAT.

FOR MY SHADOW THAT WATCHES ME WORK BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM OUT IN THE SUNSHINE

FOR A LAWN THAT NEEDS MOWING,WINDOWS THAT NEED CLEANING, AND GUTTERS THAT NEED FIXING
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE A HOME

FOR ALL THE COMPLAINING I HEAR ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT BECAUSE IT MEANS WE HAVE FREEDOM OF SPEECH. .

FOR THE PARKING SPOT I FIND AT THE FAR END OF THE PARKING LOT BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM CAPABLE OF WALKING AND I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH TRANSPORTATION .

FOR MY HUGE HEATING BILL BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM WARM.

FOR THE LADY BEHIND ME IN CHURCH WHO SINGS OFF KEY BECAUSE IT MEANS I CAN HEAR.

FOR THE PILE OF LAUNDRY AND IRONING BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE CLOTHES TO WEAR.

FOR WEARINESS AND ACHING MUSCLES AT THE END OF THE DAY BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN CAPABLE OF WORKING HARD.

FOR THE ALARM THAT GOES OFF IN THE EARLY MORNING HOURS BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM ALIVE.

AND FINALLY, FOR TOO MUCH E-MAIL BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE FRIENDS WHO ARE THINKING OF ME.

Thanks, Brandy!
Unknown "throw up butt" Playful - 16 years, 3 months, 1 day ago
Unknown
How many zeros in a billion?


This is too true to be funny.

The next time you hear a politician use the
word 'billion' in a casual manner, think about
whether you want the 'politicians' spending
YOUR tax money.

A billion is a difficult number to comprehend,
but one advertising agency did a good job of
putting that figure into some perspective in
one of it's releases.


A.
A billion seconds ago it was 1959.

B.
A billion minutes ago Jesus was alive.

C.
A billion hours ago our ancestors were
living in the Stone Age.

D.
A billion days ago no-one walked on the earth on two feet.

E.
A billion dollars ago was only
8 hours and 20 minutes,
at the rate our government
is spending it.

While this thought is still fresh in our brain...
let's take a look at New Orleans ...
It's amazing what you can learn with some simple division.


Louisiana Senator,
Mary Landrieu (D)
is presently asking Congress for
250 BILLION DOLLARS
to rebuild New Orleans . Interesting number...
what does it mean?

A.
Well... if you are one of the 484,674 residents of New Orleans
(every man, woman, and child)
you each get $516,528.

B.
Or... if you have one of the 188,251 homes in
New Orleans , your home gets $1,329,787.

C.
Or... if you are a family of four...
your family gets $2,066,012.

Washington, D. C

< HELLO! >
Are all your calculators broken??

Unknown "throw up butt" Playful - 16 years, 3 months, 1 day ago
Unknown
EXPENSIVE RECIPE

I love it when the little guy strikes back!

A little background: Neiman-Marcus, if you don't know already, is a
very expensive store; i.e., they sell your typical $8.00 T-shirt for
$50.00.

Let's let them have it! THIS IS A TRUE STORY!

My daughter and I had just finished a salad at a Neiman-Marcus Cafe
in Dallas , and we decided t o have a small dessert. Because both o f
us are such cookie lovers, we decided to try the "Neiman-Marcus
cookie."

It was so excellent that I asked if they would give me the recipe,
and the waitress said with a small frown, "I'm a fraid not, b ut you
can buy the recipe."

Well, I asked how much, and she responded, "Only two fifty. It's a
g reat deal!" I agreed to that, and told her to just add it to my
tab.

Thirty days later, I received my VISA statement, and the
Neiman-Marcus charge was $285.00! I looked again, and I remembered I
had only spent $9.95 for two salads and about $20.00 for a scarf. As I
glanced at the bottom of the statement, it said, "Cookie
Recipe-$250.00". That was outra geous!

I called Neiman's Accounting Department and told them the waitress &l t; /SPAN>
said it was "two fifty", which clearly does not mean "two hundred
and fifty dollars" by any reasonable interpretation of the phrase.

Neiman-Marcus refused to budge.

They would not r efund my money because, according to them, "What the
w aitress told you is not our problem.
You have already seen the recipe. We absolutely will not refund your
money at this point." I explained to the Accounting Department lady
the criminal st atutes which govern fraud in the state of < st1:place w:st="on"> Texas . I
threatened to report them to the Better Business Bureau and the
Texas Attorney General's office for engaging in fraud. I was
basically told, "Do what you want. Don't bother thinking of how you
can get even, and don't bother trying to ge t any of your money
back."

I just said, Okay, you folks got my $250, and now I'm going to have
$250 worth of fun." I told her that I was going to see to it that
every cookie lover in the United States with an e-mail account has a
$250 cookie recipe from Neiman-Marcus..for free. She replied, "I
wish you wouldn't do this."

I said, "Well, perhaps you should have thought of that before you
ripped me off!" and slammed down the phone.

So here it is!

Please, please, please pass it on to everyone you can possibly think
of. I paid $250 for this, and I don't want Neiman-Marcus to EVER
make another penny off of this recipe!
************************************************************

NEIMAN-MARCUS COOKIES

2 cups butter
24 oz. chocolate chips
4 cups flour
2 cups brown sugar
2 tsp. soda
1 tsp. salt
2 cups sugar
1 8 oz. Hershey Bar (grated)
5 cups blended oatmeal
4 eggs
2 tsp. baking powder
2 tsp. vanilla
3 cups chopped nuts (your choice)


Measure oatmeal, and blend in a blender to a fine powder. Cream the
butter and both sugars. Add eggs and vanilla, mix together with
flour, oatmeal, salt, baking powder, and soda. Add chocolate chips,
Hershey Bar, and nuts. Roll into balls, and place two inches apart
on a cookie sheet.

Bake for 10 minutes at 375 degrees. Makes 112 cookies.


PLEASE READ THE RECIPE AND SEND IT TO EVERY PERSON YOU KNOW WHO HAS
AN E-MAIL ADDRESS! THIS IS REALLY TERRIFIC!!


Let 's make sure we get these ladies $250.00 worth.
Enjoy the cookies, they are good..

Unknown "throw up butt" Playful - 16 years, 3 months, 1 day ago
Comments

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-Lynn-

You have been given have a beautiful day! ♥.
Crafted by MANDA
-Lynn- "✿ Sanura ✿" Emo - 15 years, 11 months, 26 days ago
Jenn Jenn
no problem, that does happen!
You have been given Showin' sum love to my girl!.
Crafted by Elisa
Jenn Jenn "ex-ownie" Feisty - 15 years, 11 months, 29 days ago
Jenn Jenn
my jackie is hiding!!! miss you
You have been given I Miss You.
Crafted by Andy Alexander
Jenn Jenn "ex-ownie" Feisty - 15 years, 12 months, 2 days ago
Jenn Jenn
hugs and kisses!! Have a good day babes!
You have been given Candy Kisses.
Crafted by Unknown
Jenn Jenn "ex-ownie" Feisty - 16 years, 4 days ago
Unknown
yeah the hat is hot .... LOL
literally :P
You have been given givin you kisses.
Crafted by Jenn Jenn
Unknown "Battle Scar Butt" Growling - 16 years, 6 days ago
monte

You have been given Good Morning Hugs and Kisses.
Crafted by Unknown
monte "Polish Princess" HP PRINCESS - 16 years, 6 days ago
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