about me?

i need constant change to keep me from being bored with life.

if you know me, you'll know that every week i have new theories, ideas and ways of living.

my attitude towards life is always changing. i lost my faith in humanity a long time ago. i owe it nothing and i don't intend on paying society back for anything.

i actually truly believe that the world can be a better place only through being totally destroyed. i believe in survival of the fittest, yet i refuse to pick on lesser animals. i let everyone do the dirty work and i just sit back and watch everyone rot their brains with the shit authority feeds us everyday. i'm not angsty, i'm not angry with the world. i just dont want to be a part of it.

i turn to self destruction because it's the most cliché way of going against everything i know.

we need suffering to know what happiness is. everyone NEEDS to suffer. i'm not sadistic, i'm just curious about self development.

i'm not deep. i'm not original and my ideas are not unique.
i'm not afraid to admit this, nor do i care much about being a hypocrite or if i am contradicting myself.

i don't feel under appreciated, and i've learnt to expect the worst from every single person i know.

i don't know what people expect from me, but i probably won't be able to deliver it.

no. i'm not sad. i'm just fucking jaded.
Unknown "Closet✂Child" Confused - 16 years, 6 months, 23 days ago

when i'm out drinking, you can bet all your money on the fact that i will be drunk the minute i step into a club or a pub.

i've been asked why i'm always drunk when i'm out, well i'd like to give you an answer but "it takes my mind off things" is the only thing i can come up with. cliche i know, but being drunk gives me an euphoric high. if i had to choose between sex and drinking, i think i'd choose the alcohol. at least then i wouldn't risk the chance on becoming pregnant - that is to say that i'm not drunk enough to let some guy rape me or take me back to his place.

i dont know what i'm talking about.

Unknown "Closet✂Child" Confused - 16 years, 7 months, 2 days ago

i'm single now, pretty much.
i've lost faith in the male species.
give me a girl.
Unknown "Closet✂Child" Confused - 16 years, 8 months, 3 days ago

i don't make excuses for myself; i make excuses for other people.

it's kind of a defence mechanism i've got going on right now. make excuses for myself and i'm someone who doesn't take full responsibility for their actions. But i make excuses for other people, take the responsibility away from their actions, well that's because i don't want to get hurt.

i'm never an exception to myself. i'm always the one who tries to perfect things, always the one who says "it's okay, you can shit all over me and i'll still smile and tell you that it's okay."

i always look so happy that these days i don't look in the mirror anymore. i don't remember when the last time i took a picture of myself was. if i was to name what characteristics i wouldn't want in a person, i'd name everything i have. i don't even know if i hate myself. i just hate being me. sometimes i think that if i wish hard enough i wouldn't have to wake up and say "hi, my name is Rosie and i'm going to let you walk all over me. please use me."

my head is like a hurricane i can't even think straight. there are so many things that i should regret, and i DO regret them but for the wrong reasons. i learn from my mistakes, but the wrong lessons.

i do everything wrong and i don't know if it's my destructive personality or the fact that i find comfort in suffering.

didn't some philosopher say that we find happiness in suffering?

this is quite kinky.


Unknown "Closet✂Child" Confused - 16 years, 8 months, 6 days ago

i find that the more they tell me that i'm going to die; the more i try my best to do it.

to each their own.
Unknown "Closet✂Child" Confused - 16 years, 8 months, 14 days ago