I have never thought of New Years as a time of resolutions. Quit smoking, start a diet.. do all the " I shoulds". I like most, have a little voice that tells me these things daily anyhow. Which of course I mostly ignore. A New year on a calendar really does not affect my level of motivation. My birthday has always been my time to reflect on my past, make personal goals, and dream of the future.
I wondered why I celebrate New Years, after all the calendar was mostly designed for the purpose of celebrating Easter. I thought about it tonight and figured out why I do.. Every New Years I always think of how lucky I am to be living in such a great country where I walk freely with no curfew or worries of bombs, watch news legally. I am not starving, have filtered water from a tap, and have the options to live however, and believe in what I chose! I celebrate how I’ve enjoyed this freedom for another full year!
I always think of the world at New Years so this year I am going to make a goal. I am currently working in the gas and oil industry. I am feel very guilty for supporting this money hungry, conglomerate! I thought a few years back that being a Medic on the Oil rigs sounds so cool! Tuff, and like a very independent job. An experience I wanted. Well here I am. I degraded myself from wanting to change the world, to becoming a supporter of a ugly industry. It was this experience last summer that forced me to see the damage we create.
I had a job working with a road / lease construction crew. I walked the zone with the crew so I knew where they would all be. It was so beautiful. This forest was shaded and cool with Pine and Poplar trees. There was a deep rich moss covering the ground with a few wild flowers. Old mans beard was littered on the Pine branches which gave it that old forest feeling. I knew it was visited by deer and moose because all the lower branches which usually hit me in the face and snag my shirt, and pants were broken off. I found a skull of a coyote in there too. I was lost in nature for a hour, following the guys, looking at animal tracks and felt so peaceful, forgetting it was all going to be gone in 2 days. After the tour I turned on the radio, went up the road in a spot with a lot of sun to read while the guys got busy. It was my first time seeing a mulcher at work. I felt like my mom just died when I looked at the already double wide road, with enough forest cleared for a 4 lane hwy, by lunch time.
Later on in the same day, I was on a dirt road in a still wooded part, while 1 km behind me was still being cleared for the new road & oil well, A beautiful moose came through the bushes on her regular route. She seen what used to be her home and totally panicked. She started down the dirt road running strait towards me and my truck, so confused she didn't even notice the vehicle and I until she was 20ft ahead. She went past only to be caught between me and the construction. I felt so overwhelmed in sorrow as I watched this big, powerful animal in panic, turning back and forth not knowing where to go. I just pictured myself going home, to find my own home torn down, surrounded by grizzly bears and cougars... I'm a bit sensitive I guess.
All I had to do was leave. They legally could not work if I left. Of course they would have me replaced by the next day, but I would have felt a lot better preventing the construction for just one day. I thought of the whole process of creating 1 well. destroying habitats, creatures, the cost and fuel it takes just to move the Drilling Rig onto a new location, the thousands of litres of fuel the rig takes, and the pollution & Chemicals it spits out. Then of course miles of forest has to be cleared for pipe lines, facilities need building, and service rigs operating on these wells for decades to come...
I have decided that if I continue in this industry, I am not going to reward myself with the money I earn here. My goal for 2009 is to go back to school! Happy New Year!
Camille Tengs "Band-aid Beauty"
- 15 years, 12 months, 3 days ago
