Crack Pot Friends

An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a pole, which she carried across her neck.
One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect and
always delivered a full portion of water, at the end of the long walk from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only y half full.

For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman bringing home
only one and a half pots of water. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half of what it had been made to do.

After 2 years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the
woman one day by the stream. "I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your house."
The old woman smiled, "Did you notice that there are flowers on your
side of the path, but not on the other pot's side?" "That's because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate the table. Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the house."

Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it's the cracks and flaws we
each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding. You've just got to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them.

SO, to all of my crackpot friends, have a great day and remember to
smell the flowers on your side of the path!

Unknown "little person" Loving - 16 years, 8 months ago

GREAT ADVICE!




If a dog was the teacher you would learn stuff like:
When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.
Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.
Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.
When it's in your best interest, practice obedience.
Let others know when they've invaded your territory.

Take naps.
Stretch before rising.
Run, romp, and play daily.

Thrive on attention and let people touch you.

Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.
On warm days, stop to lie on your back in the grass.

On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.
When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.

No matter how often you're scolded, don't buy into the guilt thing and pout .. Run right back and make friends.


Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.
Eat with gusto and enthusiasm. Stop when you have had enough.

Be loyal. Never pretend to be something you're not.
If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.
When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle them gently.


I AM THANKFUL FOR TOO MUCH E-MAIL BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE FRIENDS WHO ARE THINKING OF ME!
SEND THIS TO PEOPLE YOU CARE ABOUT ... I JUST DID


And never trust anyone until you have sniffed their butt.


Unknown "little person" Loving - 16 years, 8 months ago

THE ONION AND THE CHRISTMAS TREE

The family is sitting at the dinner table. The son asks his father, "Dad, how many kinds of boobies are there?" The father, surprised, answers:

"Well son, there's three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a woman's breasts are like melons, round & firm. In her thirties & forties, they are like pears, still nice, but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like onions."
"Onions?"

"Yes onions, you see them and they make you cry."

This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter says, "Mum, how many types of "willies" are there?" The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In his twenties, his willie is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his thirties & forties, it's like a birch tree, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree."

"A Christmas tree??"
"Yes dear, dead from the root up and the balls are for decoration only."
Unknown "little person" Loving - 16 years, 8 months ago

6 truths of life:



1) You cannot touch all of your teeth with your tongue.



2) All idiots, after reading the first truth, try it.



3) The first truth is a lie.



4) You're smiling now because you are an idiot.



5) You will soon forward this to another idiot.



6) There’s still a stupid smile on your face.



YOU LOVE ME! ;) xo

Unknown "little person" Loving - 16 years, 8 months ago

The Devil Made Me Do It



Once upon a time there lived a king.
The king had a beautiful daughter,

the PRINCESS.

But there was a problem. Everything the princess touched would melt.

No matter what;

metal,

wood,

stone,


anything she touched would melt.



Because of this, men were afraid of her. Nobody would dare marry her.


The king despaired. What could he do to help his daughter?


He consulted his wizards and magicians. One wizard told the king,


"If your daughter touches one thing that does not melt in her hands, she will be cured."


The king was overjoyed and came up with a plan.


The next day, he held a competition. Any man that could bring his daughter an object that would not melt would marry her and inherit the king's wealth.

THREE YOUNG PRINCES TOOK UP THE CHALLENGE.

The first brought a sword of the finest steel.







But alas, when the princess touched it, it melted.
The prince went away sadly.







The second prince brought diamonds.







He thought diamonds are the hardest substance in the world and would not melt.
But alas,
once the princess touched them, they melted.


He too was sent away disappointed.


The third prince approached. He told the princess,
"Put your hand in my pocket and feel what is in there."

The princess did as she was told, though she turned red.







She felt something hard. She held it in her hand.


And it did not melt!!!


The king was overjoyed. Everybody in the kingdom was overjoyed.


And the third prince married the princess and they both lived happily ever after.



Question: What was in the prince's pants?
(Scroll down for the answer)








M & M’S of course



They melt in your mouth, not in your hand.
What were you thinking??

Unknown "little person" Loving - 16 years, 8 months ago