A Kiwi and an Aussie are driving through the countryside when the Kiwi spots something of interest at the side of the road.

"Aww chick it out broo, over there, quick, pull over broo", said the Kiwi.

The Aussie pulls the car to the side of the road where he sees a sheep with its head caught in a barbed wire fence. Before they have even come to a complete stop the Kiwi is on his way over to the sheep as he unbuckles his belt.

"Aww fuckin seck broo, it mest be our lucky day broo".

Dropping his pants around his ankles, the Kiwi whips out his cock and works his magic on the sheep. He then re-gathers himself and jogs back to the car to get back in.

"Aww yeah, thet was seck broo. What are you waiting for broo, et's your turn".

The Aussie looks at him a little confused, then shrugs his shoulders, jumps out of the car, and walks over and puts his head in the fence.
Mark Dally "Marky ♥ Mark x" - 14 years, 12 months ago

I recently finished making an electric Cigar box guitar, here's the result (A bit crappy really but it works fairly well).

Cigar Box Guitars were used in the early 1900's by people who couldn't afford guitars or get to a town that sold them. They would use fencing wire for strings and tune them to whatever they thought sounded good, as they did not know about how to tune a guitar. They usually only had 3 strings.

It's made from a Cigar Box and a plank of pine wood + guitar parts and a $4 transducer for electrification and only cost about $40 to make
Mark Dally "Marky ♥ Mark x" - 15 years, 3 days ago

A little girl wakes up on her birthday and runs in to the loungeroom to greet her dad.

'Daddy, Daddy!!' she says, 'Do you know what day it is today Daddy'

'Of course I do honey', says daddy. 'I'ts my favourite little girls birthday'

'Yay. That's right Daddy', says the little girl, 'Do you know how old I am today Daddy'.
'Well of course I do, you're seven years old today' says Daddy.
That's right' says the little girl as she skips back up the hallway to grandpas room.

'Grandpa Grandpa, It's my birthday today. Do you know how old I am today grandpa".

'Well let me see' says grandpa.
'But first you'll have to pass me over your panties'.

The little girl passes her panties to Grandpa who slowly raises them to his face and takes three big whiffs.

'Well' says Grandpa, 'you must be seven years old today'.

'Wow', says the little girl. 'You must be magic Grandpa, how did you know'

And Grandpa says:
'I heard you talking to your father in the loungeroom'


Mark Dally "Marky ♥ Mark x" - 15 years, 15 days ago

A tax fraud investor visits his local Synagogue to investigate the premises.
After browsing around and finding the head Rabbi he begins a series of questions:

'I notice you use a lot of candles', he says. 'I am just wondering what you've been doing with all of the left over wax?'
'Well', says the Rabbi, 'Every couple of months we collect it all up, send it to the candle factory, and they send us a free box of candles'.

'Hmm', says the taxman, 'interesting. You also seem to go through a fair amount of communion wafers, what exactly do you do with all the crumbs?'
'Well', says the Rabbi. 'Every few months we collect them all up, put them in a box, send them to the wafer factory, and they send us a free box of wafers'.

'Well, very interesting', says the taxman. 'I notice you also advertise that you provide a service for circumcision of children. What exatly do you do with all the left over foreskin?'
'Well', says the Rabbi. 'Every year or so we collect it all up, put in a box, send it to the tax department, and they send us a Complete Prick'.

Mark Dally "Marky ♥ Mark x" - 15 years, 2 months, 21 days ago