Q: Why did Frosty the Snowman pull his pants down?

A: He heard the snowblower coming.
Unknown "My Devilicious" Hurt - 15 years, 10 months, 26 days ago

A man rushes out of his wife's hospital room. "Doctor, doctor -- my wife's been in a coma for several months, but when I just touched her left breast, she sighed!"

"That's very encouraging," says the doctor. "Go back and touch her right breast. See if she reacts."

A few minutes later, the man rushes out again: "Doctor, she moaned!"

"Very good," says the doctor. "Now try oral sex. She should certainly react to that!"

Five minutes later, the man comes out back out, white as a sheet. "Doctor -- she died."

"No! What happened?" the doctor exclaims.

"Well, doc," the man says tearfully, "she choked."
Unknown "My Devilicious" Hurt - 15 years, 10 months, 26 days ago

An expert fisherman is a ''master-baiter.'''
Unknown "My Devilicious" Hurt - 15 years, 11 months, 14 days ago

Grandma & Grandpa are sitting on the porch, when all of a sudden Grandma slaps Grandpa.

"That's for 50 years of the worst sex I've ever had."

They're both silent for ten minutes. Then Grandpa slaps Grandma.

"That's for knowin' the difference."
Unknown "My Devilicious" Hurt - 15 years, 11 months, 14 days ago

Q: What goes in hard and pink, but comes out soft and mushy?

A: Bubblegum -- and you should be ashamed of yourself.
Unknown "My Devilicious" Hurt - 15 years, 11 months, 14 days ago