the pledge - a piece of me

when i was sick
there was a scene
where my soul was asleep
and in a dream
i was talking up
to the light divine
and asking why
i was trying
help me please
was my hurt cry
i was so lost
i felt like dying
the one i love
beyond all else
is so lost too
and i can't help
i can't go on
along this vein
please, i'll do anything
to fix this pain
so the spirit smiled down
and said for true?
then we all have
a question for you
will you take
this divine task
will you agree
that's all we ask
what is it you wish?
my sadness cried
it's more like what you can do,
they all replied
we know that
your strength has failed
but what would you do
if it was retailored?
would you take on
an epic task
would you love full love?
is what they asked
would you show
a love complete
unbreakable strength
faith throughout defeat?
look at that man
fragile and flawed
would you love him
as does god?
would you be the example
of sweet, pure love
simple enough
to god above
elusive though
to those misused
unbelieveable
to those abused?
despite his mistakes
imperfections galore
he's not perfect;
could you love him more?
and i looked at him
so unwell
i thought of the doubts
and questions to tell
then i stepped deep inside
my unkillable self
and looked on my love
in its divine wealth
and i made a decision
that fateful time
i considered it all
made the choice mine
yes i will love him
in all those ways
others have failed
for all my days
i will show him
unbeatable love
i will give him example
of unfailing love
all my power
divine light; strength
for him, at least,
go any length
my holy power
all that i am
i will do it all
for the love of that man
so i looked up there
and the divine smiled down
i will, with conviction
my pure gaze shone
and they nodded as one
that eternal light there
and the binding was done
the contract fair
so it is said
and so am i bound
to my words to the spirit
and my promise all round
to be the example
of absolute love
to fulfill my task
to him above
but when i get lost
and am crying alone
i call out my pain
please toss me a bone
am i still on the path?
am i forgot?
will i ever be happy?
or is this my lot?
and i stumble around
til the answer i get
confuses me still;
you're not lost yet
we're always here
though not in your sight
don't lose faith
and don't forget your light
when you doubt and you fear
feel apart and adrift
remember this pledge
and remember your gifts
when all seems lost
don't doubt your reward
everyone deserves love
but sometimes it's hard
keep faith in yourself
it whispers to me
and one day your works
will be easy to see
you won't be let down
sometimes i hear
but my heart's just human
and so i fear
i fall to the void
and am terribly sad
i want so much to be loved
and it's driving me mad
i struggle with hope
who's rare been a friend
but i've pledged to be strong
right up past the end
an endless love,
respectful and wise
everything for one man
but that's not the whole prize
for in love so wide
and deep as the sea
there will learn love for all
a lesson for me
so during that time
when my spark was adrift
and i asked for help
and a spiritual lift
this was the question
asked by the light
will i give up now?
or continue to fight?
will i tap that source
eternal strength mine
manifest my own power
and show the divine?
by pledge i am bound
proud, happy to serve
for i finally saw
that perfect world
Unknown "Conquering Queen" Loyal - 15 years, 10 months, 5 days ago

THE 7 THINGS QUIZ

7 THINGS I HATE DOING OR THAT SCARE ME
1. Hate doing: Get up when I have no enthusiasm to
2. Hate doing: Yards of repetitive tasks
3. Hate doing: Dealing with Chaotic Neutral people
4. Afraid of: Brutal trauma
5. Afraid of: Being forgotten
6. Afraid of: The world dying
7. Afraid of: Becoming irrelevant

7 THINGS I LIKE OR ENJOY DOING
1. I like: Being comfortable
2. I like: Moving my body
3. I like: Travel
4. I like: Writing
5. I enjoy: Reading
6. I enjoy: Swimming
7. I enjoy: Relaxing

7 RANDOM FACTS ABOUT ME
1. My dominant features are largely inherited from my mother's line, and we all have similar traits
2. I can do a half-bend handstand
3. My memory is semi-photographic, which makes my discernment, judgement and editing skills better than most
4. I've won awards for my writing
5. I don't wear contacts often because most people seem intimidated by me when they can see my eyes
6. If I lay in the snow, it calms me
7. I inherited my empathetic insight and prediction from my father's ESP. I also know when one of his family has died.

7 IMPORTANT THINGS IN MY ROOM
1. Blankets
2. Rug
3. Reading light
4. Books
5. Cat
6. Bed
7. Dresser

7 THINGS I PLAN TO DO BEFORE I DIE
1. Have the experiences I've dreamed of around the world
2. Be the most successful mother ever (how I define it)
3. Change the things about the world I know I can
4. Be my unique example of beauty, grace, strength and vitality/health
5. Be loved the way I need
6. Change the things about my life that will cripple or disable me later on
7. Discover the secret of youth

7 THINGS I CAN DO
1. Be matchlessly strong (not physically, emotionally/mentally)
2. Forgive, again and again
3. Lift someone if I really want to
4. Write stories or poetry in any writing style I read
5. Gymnastics
6. Cook, clean and bake, including following/improvising a recipe
7. Use tools and do pretty much any common household fixing/renovation

7 THINGS I CAN'T OR WILL NOT DO
1. Cheat
2. Steal
3. Suffer bullies
4. Allow unfairness
5. Ignore a cry for help
6. Jump from a plane
7. Gossip/backstab

7 THINGS I SAY MOST
1. On-line: Helo
2. On-line: Good lord
3. On-line: Are you implying...?
4. On-line: ?
5. In Real Life: Good lord
6. In Real Life: Are you implying... ?
7. In Real Life: I'll (insert verb used by target here) your ass, all right...
Unknown "Conquering Queen" Loyal - 15 years, 10 months, 25 days ago

Sorry, what I meant was, "This song is how I feel. To me, that means dark and slithery and dangerous and alluring, with some anticipation mixed in. You'd really have to hear it to understand.
Unknown "Conquering Queen" Loyal - 15 years, 11 months, 11 days ago

Muse - Supermassive Black Hole
This song is how I feel

Oh baby dont you know I suffer?
Oh baby can you hear me moan?
You caught me under false pretenses
How long before you let me go?

You set my soul alight
You set my soul alight

(You set my soul alight)
Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the supermassive

(You set my soul alight)
Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the 'supermassive'

I thought I was a fool for no-one
Oh baby I'm a fool for you
You're the queen of the superficial
And how long before you tell the truth

You set my soul alight
You set my soul alight

(You set my soul alight)
Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the supermassive

(You set my soul alight)
Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the 'supermassive'

Supermassive black hole
Supermassive black hole
Supermassive black hole
Supermassive black hole

Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the supermassive

Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the supermassive

(You set my soul alight)
Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the supermassive

(You set my soul alight)
Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the supermassive

Supermassive black hole
Supermassive black hole
Supermassive black hole
Supermassive black hole
Unknown "Conquering Queen" Loyal - 15 years, 11 months, 26 days ago

The Death Fair Queen

And come the white death, cold,
to cast Gaea's children into sleep
You are my salvation, lo,
time stills within your keep
I am your servant, aye,
and from the sensible plane
But upon your rich lifeless breath, I,
sense all coldest Death
and transcend the Mundane

Your pale Beauty glows, deep
reflected in light by worshipful white
Flakes in the dance, leap,
chill winds dust dark night
Still silence now yours, eternal,
that breathless chance
Growth, life; ceased all, vernal,
Spring now a myth
for Winter's frozen romance

Royal are thou in your silver robes, coating,
all and blue as Night's skies
But blanche is your fearful beauty, gloating,
As warm Life dies
Perfect in form and grace, true,
thine gifts touch hearts and souls,
For your breath-stealing beauty, you,
enliven me with your matchless death;
now my poet's word extols.



Unknown "Conquering Queen" Loyal - 15 years, 12 months, 4 days ago