Dont forget to buy from my shops!!!!
Unknown "XOX mine XOX" Sleepy - 16 years, 9 months, 17 days ago

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost

Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.

Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
Unknown "XOX mine XOX" Sleepy - 16 years, 9 months, 19 days ago

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.
Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird

Unknown "XOX mine XOX" Sleepy - 16 years, 9 months, 19 days ago

Ask everyone you meet, "Hot enough for you?"

Sing the "Barney" theme song as loud as you can.

If you see kids building a sand castle, say, "That's not a real castle!"

Every time when you're about to duck under the water, yell, "Down periscope!"

Go swimming in a full business suit. If people notice, act like they're the weirdos.

Put sea shell to your ear and announce to first person to pass by, "It's for you!" Repeat several times.

Throw jellyfish around.

Tune radio to all-news station and blast as loud as you can, then nod your head and snap your fingers like you're listening to some happenin' tunes.

Act like a sea gull.

Wear t-shirt that says, "I'm the coolest dude on this pathetic beach. No autographs please."
Unknown "XOX mine XOX" Sleepy - 16 years, 10 months ago

There once was a human pet named robbie.. who was very bored.. so yea.. like.. talk to him and such
Unknown "XOX mine XOX" Sleepy - 16 years, 10 months, 7 days ago