A man was riding his Harley along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said,' Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.' The biker pulled over and said, 'Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want.' The Lord said, 'Your request is materialistic, think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking; the supports required reaching the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind.' The biker thought about it for a long time. Finallyhe said, 'Lord, I wish that I, and all men, could understand our wives and girlfriends; I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy.' The Lord replied, 'You want two lanes or four on that bridge?
Unknown "★GlAmOuR♥" Crazy - 16 years, 7 months, 5 days ago

Learn Chinese in 5 minutes !!!


That's not right! >> Sum Ting Wong

Are you harbouring a fugitive? >> Hu Yu Hai Ding

See me ASAP >> Kum Hia Nao

Small Horse >>Tai Ni Po Ni

Did you go to the beach? >>Wai Yu So Tan

I bumped into a coffee table! >>Ai Bang Mai Fu Kin Ni

It's very dark in here! >> Wai So Dim

I thought you were on a diet! >> Wai Yu Mun Ching

This is a tow away zone! >>No Pah King

Our meeting is scheduled for next week! >>Wai Yu Kum Nao

Staying out of sight >>Lei Ying Lo

He's cleaning his automobile >>Wa Shing Ka

Great >>Fa Kin Su Pa



Unknown "★GlAmOuR♥" Crazy - 16 years, 7 months, 24 days ago

A little girl asked her mother: How did the human race appear? The mother answered: God made Adam and Eve and they had children and so was all mankind made.

Two days later she asks her father the same question.The father answered: Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race was developed.The confused girl returns to her mother and says: Mom', how is it possible that you told me that the human race was created by God and Papa says they were developed from monkeys.

The mother answers: Well dear, it is very simple. I told you about the origin of my side of the family while your father told you about his side..
Unknown "★GlAmOuR♥" Crazy - 16 years, 7 months, 25 days ago

This has got to be one of the cleverest I've received in a while. Someone out there either has too much spare time or is deadly at Scrabble.

PRINCESS DIANA
When you rearrange the letters:
END IS A CAR SPIN


MONICA LEWINSKY
When you rearrange the letters:
NICE SILKY WOMAN

DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROO M

ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER

DESPERATION
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE

A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE


MOTHER-IN-LAW:
When you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER


Unknown "★GlAmOuR♥" Crazy - 16 years, 7 months, 25 days ago

TWO OLD MEN DECIDE THEY ARE CLOSE TO THEIR LAST DAYS
AND DECIDE TO HAVE A LAST NIGHT ON THE TOWN.
AFTER A FEW DRINKS, THEY END UP AT THE LOCAL BROTHEL

THE MADAM TAKES ONE LOOK AT THE TWO OLD GEEZERS
AND WHISPERS TO HER MANAGER, 'GO UP TO THE FIRST
TWO BEDROOMS AND PUT AN INFLATED DOLL IN EACH BED.
THESE TWO ARE SO OLD AND DRUNK, I'M NOT WASTING
TWO OF MY GIRLS ON THEM. THEY WON'T KNOW
THE DIFFERENCE.'

AS THEY ARE WALKING HOME THE FIRST MAN SAYS,
'YOU KNOW, I THINK MY GIRL WAS DEAD!'

'DEAD?' SAYS HIS FRIEND, 'WHY DO YOU SAY THAT?'

'WELL, SHE NEVER MOVED OR MADE A SOUND ALL THE
TIME I WAS LOVING HER.'

HIS FRIEND SAYS, 'COULD BE WORSE I THINK MINE WAS
A WITCH.'

'A WITCH ??. . . WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU SAY THAT?'

'WELL, I WAS MAKING LOVE TO HER, KISSING HER ON
THE NECK, AND I GAVE HER A LITTLE BITE, THEN SHE
FARTED AND FLEW OUT THE WINDOW... TAKING MY
TEETH WITH HER'
Unknown "★GlAmOuR♥" Crazy - 16 years, 7 months, 29 days ago