~~~ A DREAM ~~~
I had a dream. A dream that was once beautiful and sweet, which lingers on till one day, if that one day comes by, it will replace this dream.
We met and know each other in an unusual occurrence. I’m not sure whether I fell for you first or vice versa. You claimed you liked me and loved me and when I asked you how deep your love to me, you replied “Deeper than you.” I wondered were you serious or just trying to make me happy. But with your non-stop action and persistency, somehow, you really made me believe that you seriously care and love me deeply (or probably you did at that particular moment). I did not doubt your words, your action or you yourself even though things tell me differently but I still insist to believe and stands by your side. I shared all my worries with you before. Somehow your assurance managed to push my fears away. You advised me to follow my heart and not listen to what I have heard. Probably you were right but it is not easy to turn a deaf ear to what I heard.
Things went on brilliantly and fiercely at first that I feel happy, contented and feeling I’m at cloud nine which as far as I remembered, I have never felt this way before. Everyday I hope the time will stop and not pass by but I guess, no one can control the time and hope turns into a wish that never going to happen. I remembered I told you once before (or few times) that love is just like a beautiful fireworks that went up the sky spectacularly and fade out in a fleeting moment. Yet you tell me otherwise and you are not like that and that time will tell. Somehow, what I fear off and afraid off did materialize. I have always not believe in love and have very little faith in it as I have been let down before with many broken promises and dreams that are just for the sake of painting.
Probably I’m not supposed to fall for you but I guess my heart is just too soft, easily touched and manipulated. I’m not blaming you or condemn you for what happen but I feel you need to know. My feeling for you is real and seriously, I am falling hard and deep for you. I know I’m going to get very hurt carrying this torch with me and no matter how hard I tried to convince myself that this is over. Yet I’m still hoping that one day, it’ll turn out alright for both us and only I overly reacted.
Probably our love is not deep enough and not genuine enough. Probably it is not love but only infatuation. Or could it be the timing? Whatever it is, I guess, what we had, I will cherish it for as long as I can until there comes a day that new memories are made that I no longer feel the need to cling on to “our memories”. I do hope that that day will come soon as clinging on to “our memories” are taxing and sometimes I feel so tired that I wish to let go of everything and start all over again with a new life (I do have my weakest frame of mind at times but do not worry, I will not end my life just because I failed).
Note: This is a short story that I edited from a dream I once had. I have wondered before whether this have happen to me before or it’s just a dream that is so real. These dreams really provoke my thoughts at such hour late into night where most people already in a cruise to Fantasy Island.
So, this is something to think about. Should I linger on and wait for miracle to happen? Will wait be the best option? Or letting it go and look for something that are steady and offers me more security be the best option?
Unknown "♥Cindy♥" Carefree
- 16 years, 6 months, 15 days ago
