I sit in my office – which was actually intended as shelf storage for books and the only lighting is the many florescent bulbs that flicker in it - it’s only 2pm and my head is already promising pain before I try to sleep tonight. My job at the college bookstore isn’t all that hard – I answer phones, process bills to be paid and answer customer’s questions as best as possible to a limit. I emphasize on the “limit” for there are certain bits of information that I am not allowed to answer – even though I think it’s silly to do so.
“I’ll have the money to you as soon as I’m able” her voice reminds me that I’m also right next to the time clock. She hangs up the cell hone with an annoyance “I swear these kids are costing me more then it’s worth” - it’s amazing really how invisible I am in plain sight and hearing range. Someone next to her inquires on what she’s paying for and she answers him grumpily “have to pay these dumb lawyers”. First thing in my mind sarcastically is “Wow, what a loving mother” as I imagine the possibilities for her to be annoyed by her kids so and need a lawyer.
Time slowly goes by as people ask if we have this book, that pencil, or this scantron available. And as I point to all the corners of the store from behind a half door in a hurried rush, they give me a look like I’m asking them to bear the one ring alone on a quest to destroy it in Mount Doom. And I have to explain that I’m like Repunsel stuck in a tower – without the waiting for the handsome prince bit and a phone binds her to the tower instead of a witch – and can’t go out to help them with their order.
The phone continues to scream until I finally answer it “Bookstore, how may I HELP you?”. I say help like a woman in an abused relationship trying to hint to her best friend that she needs help out of it but not wishing to alert her abusive man to her attempts.
“Hi, I need to know what books are required for my classes and the prices” she stabs me with the one limited thing I can’t tell her by order. Why? For two reasons mainly.
1) It’s too busy for me to spend 30 minutes to help one person figure out over the phone what books she needs for all 6 classes.
2) Prices are subject to change and if she comes next week and a publisher decides to charge us more, then we have to raise the price.
3) If I tell her the availability and we don’t have it due to the busy buyers right now, then we don’t want to deal with her angry attitude over that.
So I tell her what I have to “I’m sorry ma’am, but we are requesting all students to come into the bookstore to see what books are being used and their prices in the store”.
She is angry now “Why is that?!”. And then I have to give her the long list of reasons that I am told why we can’t. She then grumbles to me “I can’t make it over there before classes start, I can’t get a babysitter”. I again tell her that “I’m sorry but I can’t” as I stare at the blinking screaming lights on the phone – telling me that others are wishing to yell at me after her. “I guess I’ll go to a different college that will help me better. Thank you.”
Before I can say anything she hangs up. Then it occurs to me…why can’t she come to the store without a babysitter? Now my mind is imagining a baby chained or caged in a home – unable to ever leave. I know this is more then likely not how she cares for her child and know she’s bull shitting me with the guilt of her being a mother that has to care for a child.
I answer the next line and wonder when children became more of a burden than a blessing.
Unknown "Mywolf" Inspired
- 16 years, 10 months, 10 days ago
