SOMETHING LESS PAINFULL THAN CRASHING
(One of my articles published Tuesday 12 August 2008)
Every day we walk around crashing into the people around us.
Sometimes we don’t even notice the people we crash into, yet we affect their lives in ways that may never be known to us.
They say that every cause has an effect and that every action has an equal and opposite reaction, but how often do we stop to think about what that effect or reaction is?
When you walk down the street and smile at the person walking by, has it ever crossed your mind that perhaps you could have changed that person’s entire day?
Your smile, which will have taken you all of two seconds, could have restored their hope, or flattered their senses, and the ripple effect of that action could be enormous.
Unfortunately, in the same way that a smile could make a person’s day, there are so many things we do that have very negative effects.
Wrapped up in our own lives we walk around with our heads either buried in the sand or up in the clouds, and very few of us ever stop to look around at what we are doing to the people around us.
At times this world can be a very lonely place. When we cannot get what we need from those closest to us, we thrive on the tiny moments of contact with strangers to get us through the day.
In a scene from “Crash”, the 2004 Oscar winning movie by Paul Haggis, Detective Graham Waters had this to say: “It’s the sense of touch. In any real city, you walk, you know? You brush past people, people bump into you. In LA, nobody touches you. We’re always behind this metal and glass. I think we miss that touch so much, that we crash into each other, just so we can feel something”.
Could this be true? Are we so caught up in ourselves that we have forgotten how to reach out to others or notice when they reach out to us?
We seem to be a generation of people so focused on our careers and getting through the day that we don’t take the time to explore the simple pleasures in life.
We have also become so desensitised to our surroundings that we see and hear things that should be shocking or upsetting, and yet many of us barely react.
I believe that despite our need to feel independent, like we don't need another person’s validation to complete us, eventually everyone needs to feel something that only another person can give.
When last did you randomly message someone you love just to tell them that you love them?
We always presume that they already know this so there is no reason to tell them. We imagine that everyone is okay, but the truth is that sometimes they aren’t.
Instead of crashing into them later – why not let them know now?
One little moment of love could be their saving grace.
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