PREGNANT TURKEY STORY



One year at Thanksgiving, my mom went to my sister's house for the

traditional feast. Knowing how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to

play a trick. She told my sister that she needed something from the

store. When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of the oven,

removed the stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen, and inserted it into the

turkey, and re-stuffed the turkey. She then placed the bird(s) back in

the oven. When it was time for dinner, my sister pulled the turkey out

of the oven and proceeded to remove the stuffing. When her serving

spoon hit something, she reached in and pulled out the little bird.



With a look of total shock on her face, my mother exclaimed, "Patricia,
you've cooked a pregnant bird!" At the reality of this horrifying news,

my sister started to cry. It took the family two hours to convince her

that turkeys lay eggs!



Yep.... SHE'S BLONDE!

Unknown "☆Sugar Toes☆" Feeling Kinda Lost - 16 years, 4 months, 19 days ago

(Anderson & Howe)

I’ll be the round about
the words will make you out ’n’ out
you change the day your way
call it morning driving thru the sound and in and out the valley

The music dance and sing
they make the children really ring
I spend the day your way
call it morning driving thru the sound and in and out the valley


In and around the lake
mountains come out of the sky and they stand there
one mile over we’ll be there and we’ll see you
ten true summers we’ll be there and laughing too
twenty four before my love you’ll see I’ll be there with you

I will remember you
your silhouette will charge the view
of distance atmosphere
call it morning driving thru the sound and even in the valley

Along the drifting cloud the eagle searching down on the land
catching the swirling wind the sailor sees the rim of the land
the eagles dancing wings create as weather spins out of hand
go closer hold the land feel partly no more than grains of sand
we stand to lose all time a thousand answers by in our hand
next *to* your deeper fears we stand
surrounded by a millions years

Unknown "☆Sugar Toes☆" Feeling Kinda Lost - 16 years, 4 months, 19 days ago

He was a hard-headed man he was brutally handsome
And she was terminally pretty
She held him up and he held for ransom
In the heart of the cold, cold city
He had a nasty reputation as a cruel dude
They said he was ruthless said he was crude
They had one thing in common
They were good in bed
She said, faster, faster.
the lights are turning red.

Life in the fast lane
Surely make you lose your mind
Life in the fast lane

Are you with me so far?

Eager for action hot for the game
The calling attraction the drop of the name
They knew all the right people
They took all the right pills
They threw outrageous parties
They paid heavenly bills
There were lines on the mirror, lines on her face
She pretended not to notice she was caught up in the race
Out every evening until it was light
He was too tired to make it she was too tired to fight about it

Life in the fast lane
Surely make you lose your mind
Life in the fast lane
Life in the fast lane
Everything all the time
Life in the fast lane

Glowing and burning blinded by thirst
They didnt see the stop sign
Took a turn for the worse
She said, listen baby. you can hear the engine rev.
weve up and down this highway, havent seen a goddamn thing.
He said, call the doctor. I think Im gonna crash.
the doctor say hes coming but you gotta pay in cash.
They were rushing down that freeway,
Messed around and got lost
They didnt care they were just dieing to get off and it was

Life in the fast lane
Surely make you lose your mind
Life in the fast lane
Life in the fast lane
Everything all the time
Life in the fast lane

Life in the fast lane
Life in the fast lane

Unknown "☆Sugar Toes☆" Feeling Kinda Lost - 16 years, 4 months, 19 days ago

DAMN...

A crusty old man walks into the local Lutheran Church and says to the secretary, "I would like to join this damn church." The astonished woman replies, "I beg your pardon, sir. I must have misunderstood you. What did you say?" "Listen up, damn it. I said I want to join this damn church!" "I'm very sorry sir, but that kind of language is not tolerated in this church." The secretary leaves her desk and goes into the pastor's study to inform him of her situation. The pastor agrees that the secretary does not have to listen to that foul language. They both return to her office and the pastor asks the old geezer, "Sir, what seems to be the problem here?" "There is no damn problem," the man says. "I just won $200 million bucks in the damn lottery and I want to join this damn church to get rid of some of this damn money. " "I see," said the pastor. "And is this bitch giving you a hard time?"
Unknown "☆Sugar Toes☆" Feeling Kinda Lost - 16 years, 4 months, 27 days ago

HELLO, If you take the time to visit my profile..Please take the time to do some thumbing..I do not expect you to go all the way to the end..but I will return the favor and 20 - 25 pages would be nice! I also leave lots of gifts if you thumb me and I just love to be thumbed!! LOL
Unknown "☆Sugar Toes☆" Feeling Kinda Lost - 16 years, 11 months, 11 days ago