MY Best Friend

MY best friend hurts me more than any other person I know. MY best friend has knocked me down more than anyone…Made my self esteem dive to the ground…Made me feel unworthy…used…and torn. MY best friend has broken my heart more than any other man or boy has in my entire being. I’m in love with MY best friend. MY best friend won’t give me a chance…MY best friend will fuck me though…literally. MY best friend…I don’t know why he is my best friend anymore…but I used to. MY best friend has had me waiting and waiting (because I thought he was worth the wait…) for years. It took me years to get over MY best friend and now history is repeating itself. My best friend toys with my mind. MY best friend has had me chasing him for years. MY best friend knows what it feels like to be left in the dust.

So why is it easy for me to throw away MY best friend? Because it’s easier than loving him. It’s easier than waiting for that chance. It’s easier than crying for hours on end. It’s easier than being dumped or walked on. It’s easier than watching his happiness. It’s easier than watching him fuck someone new. It’s easier than feeling worthless. It’s easier than looking down at the dirt and feeling apart of it. It’s easier than feeling, loving, yearning…and being told “no” time and time again. It’s easier than understanding. It’s easier than giving in. It’s easier to be depressed than to pretend not to be. It’s easier to give up. It’s easier than knowing you will never be “the” girl. It’s easier than putting on a “face”. It’s easier than seeing and talking to MY best friend every waking day and hearing about everything new and exciting in their life. It’s easier to be predictable. It’s easier than trying another solution. It’s easier to move forward. It’s easier than staying right here. It’s easier than feeling what I do. Right now….It’s easier without YOU!

Unknown "Metal Sexiness" Frisky - 16 years, 2 months, 22 days ago

"I believe in dreams. I believe that every night on the planet everything that was, and can be, is dreamt. I believe that what happens in dreams is no different and no less important than what happens in the waking world. I believe that dreams are the closest equivalent present day mankind has to time travel. I believe you can visit your past, present, and future in dreams. I believe I've dreamt half my life that hasn't happened yet..."

~Marilyn Manson
Unknown "Metal Sexiness" Frisky - 16 years, 4 months, 4 days ago

Eh...so things are going ok....always the same again. Im enjoying my jpb finally, although it can be very stressful at times...especially when Im short staffed...which is like all the time...otherwise...things are just getting boring....I need to do something exciting, or go on holidays....just get away for like a week if it was at all possible!!!

I ran into an old....idk...friend today which was weird. Someone I thought I would never see again and it really got me thinking. I was so mean to him all the time...all because I didnt understand him, so I was just a bitch...eventually he got the hint and fucked off...now like 6 months later I see him....weird. I said hi but was so nervous I as shaking!! I was waiting for him to tell me off or something, but it didnt happen. We exchanged numbers...

life is just weird...
Unknown "Metal Sexiness" Frisky - 16 years, 4 months, 6 days ago

"Stone Sour" Zzyzx Rd. lyrics (GOOD SONG)

I don't know how else to put this
It's taken me so long to do this
I'm falling asleep and I can't see straight
My muscles feel like a melee
My body's curled in a U-shape
I put on my best but I'm still afraid

Propped up by lies and promises
Saving my place as life forgets
Maybe its time I saw the world

I'm only here for a while
But patience is not my style
And I'm so tired that I gotta go

Where am I supposed to hide now?
What am I suppose to do?
Did you really think I wouldn't see this through

Tell me I should stick around for you
Tell me I could have it all
I'm still too tired to care and I gotta go

I get to go home in one week
But I leaving home in three weeks
They throw me a bone just to pick me dry

I'm following suit and directions
I crawl up inside for protection
I'm told what to do and I don't know why

I'm over existing in limbo
I'm over the myths and placebos
I don't really mind if I just fade away

I'm ready to live with my family
I'm ready to die in obscurity
Cause I'm so tired that I gotta go

Where am I supposed to hide now?
What am I suppose to do?
You still don't think I'm going see this through

Tell me I'm a part of history
Tell me I can have it all
I'm still to tired to care and I gotta go

Oh yeah
Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah.

Still too tired to care and I gotta go
Still too tired to care and I gotta go
Still too tired to care and I gotta go

Yeah, yeah

Still to tired to care and I gotta go

Go home

Still to tired to care and I gotta go

Yeah yeah

Still to tired to care and I gotta go




Unknown "Metal Sexiness" Frisky - 16 years, 5 months, 25 days ago

So today Im overwhelmed...Im moving into my parents basement which is the most degrading thing in the world for someone who has been living on her own for the past few yrs...I could afford my own place but Ill never pay off my debt to get ahead...this way i dont need to pay rent or anything...I could just put money away for my future. Yet...even with that on my mind Im so sad about it. Im afraid of being unhappy there...I dont get along with my parents and living with them makes me feel like a child. There are so many pros and cons...its too late...most of my stuff is there and there is hardly any rm for all my shit...it sucks. The boyfriend has been pissing me off and I dont even know why. I have been trying so damn hard to make the relationship work that its stressing me out. No one should have to try this hard...if your meant to be together you just fit..problems and all. BLAH!
Unknown "Metal Sexiness" Frisky - 16 years, 5 months, 26 days ago