yeah, i cant sleep forever, Leenie... so much so that i have not slept a wink till now....
Unknown "Fordey" Sad - 15 years, 2 months, 20 days ago

life does have its twisted fate and unpredictable struck just as they are meant to be... i am still wondering how to handle the situation that burdened me for years when a big twist of the situation occurred. I realised painfully one thing, not seeing does not mean not happening, not hearing does not mean not thinking, not showing does not mean not loving... we often tell others to appreciate the daily little things that others do, yet these are the little things that is invisible to me till they are pointed out... what a biggest fool have i become.... trying to create the joke of the century or what? i have yet allowed someone that i loved to by hurt by my silly doings. This time round, even more deeply, even more hurt, even more tears... Oh God, what have fordey done.... dun ask me, i am not going to tell... let a self proclaimed smart alec who is actually a big idiot try to work his way out....

why is life so unpredictable? i hate this unpredictability. i hate where i am, who i am, what i am. i just wanna sleep forever and forever, but i cant sleep forever. second day. still haven taken much food. alcohol as water. good work, a slow suicidal manner of killing myself. it is a surprise that my gastric have not get me rolling on the floor till now. my tots turned to the other person. i guess she is suffering as much as me. we are so alike in this aspect, adopting the same suicidal way...
Unknown "Fordey" Sad - 15 years, 2 months, 21 days ago

Tada~~~ Adored Fordey is back.... gotta dive into bed soon... din get much sleep on the midnight flight.... freezing in China especially when the wind blows but was a good experience in learning new stuff in another culture... my CV grows again but come Monday, I think will be work loaded to death... damned... 1 whole week away.... and the ang mos.... so unproductive....
Unknown "Fordey" Sad - 15 years, 3 months, 12 days ago

Fordey will be in China for a week... Kena arrow to audit in one of the project so close to CNY.... and the email that came up in my email.... selected due to the excellence in your work... wah kaozzzz...... selected cos you are doing your work so the management have decided to load you with more work..... anyway.... dun miss Fordey... he will be frozen in cold China.... damn, zero to minus four degrees... still need to waste money to buy winter clothings.....
Unknown "Fordey" Sad - 15 years, 3 months, 19 days ago

just back from a biz trip in malaysia, kl... some torrid rains most of the days that i am there.... slightly down with a cold
Unknown "Fordey" Sad - 15 years, 4 months, 17 days ago