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Unknown
Unknown owns this human at 63000 points.
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Unknown
"Lao maa"



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Unknown
Last login: over 3 weeks ago
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"Sonny"
42704 pts
Playful
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"Stunning"
19600 pts

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"Princess Pinky"
10967 pts

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"My love!"
2000 pts

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"lucky star"
600 pts
Peaceful
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"Mr Niceguy"
207 pts
Unknown's tales
Unknown
Personally, Lohan used to be my favourite, till she kept hogging the limelight for attention. Now Richie has moved up to first place.....

Figure-wise, Lohan was, is and still will be, my favourite. LOVE HER BOOBS!!!!!!!!! =p
Unknown "Lao maa" Adored - 16 years, 10 months, 29 days ago
Unknown
Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears and Nicole Richie; who would win the catfight?

I guess Paris Hilton.

Lindsay lohan is too busy doing every single one of the male species she can get her claws on.

Nicole richie is busy changing nappies and wailing cos of her post-natal fats.

Britney Spears cannot be considered a sexy and slender like a cat anymore- it'd have to be a pig fight if she was in it.

Paris Hilton has her fire crotch spewing friends to fight her battle; plus she's the only one left! so she wins.
Unknown "Lao maa" Adored - 16 years, 10 months, 29 days ago
Unknown
When Victoriana and Jane reached Cinladida's house, they fought to tell her all about "fearsome Wolfy with rugged good looks and a chiselled jawline"... Then. the inevitable happened.....

Jane: He threw up cos he was so enamoured by my beauty!
Victoriana: No he didn't! He threw up for me!
J: NO! MEE!!!
V: NO!!! ME!!!!!!!!

A huge catfight followed, none bothering about Cinladida wailing about her precious china, (actually bought from the cheap shop for just $1), or the pale looking Wolfy who had arrived at the stone house.

Wolfy: lil pig, lil pig, let me in! or i'll huff and i'll puff and blow your house down!

Cinladida: (stutters, trying to process wolfy's words... and recall what her husband had taught her to do in such situations.) ermm... uh... My husband's gonna come back and shoot you and... uh..... i think he might like, use your fur as.. uh.. maybe like, a new furcoat for me? and... uh... i always wanted to have a wolf-skin tote bag......

There was a click, and the door opened.

Wolfy: Babe, you forgot to lock the door again!!!

Anyway, Wolfy couldn't be bothered with the bimbo, and was relatively distracted by the aroma of roast pork in the air- Victoriana and Jane by now, had fought so hard, they fell into a huge oven!!! ooo. Roast pork!

He drew his pistol, Cinladida turned to run... straight into a wall. As the blood seeped out of the wound on her head.. Wolfy swore that he heard a hissing sound.. like that of air seeping out of a balloon.

"What an airhead!" thought Wolfy.

He took one last sniff of the aroma of roast pork, then walked out of the house. Alas, he doctor had warned him against high cholesterol food, and Wolfy could not have roast pork anymore.

The end.
Unknown "Lao maa" Adored - 16 years, 11 months, 14 days ago
Unknown
The Three Silly Pigs

Once upon a time, there were 3 little pigs. Although they seemed to get along very well on the surface, each secretly felt that each was better then the other. (Really though, all 3 were just equally pathetic.)

The oldest little pig, Victoriana, was ugly, arrogant, fat and lazy. Thus, no boy-pigs wanted her. She had to build her house all by herself, and decided with straw as it was lighter to carry, and was "THE" colour that season.

The second little pig was Jane, the "fake". She always lied that her name was actually Jhaine Emelind Paree Hilton- a distant relative of the famed socialite. She was lazy too, but would work hard to make things look good. She lived alone and miserable in her rotten wooden house, that looked like a marble mansion from the outside. (She learnt how to get the marbelling effects from DIY books.)

The youngest little pig, seemed the most successful. Youth, a husband, a neat stone cottage with a white picket fence. Cinladida was the typical gossipy and brainless bimbo.

One day, their long time enemy came along, annoyed that he had to make yet ANOTHER appearance in another silly tale. After all, his business was doing well now, and he was no longer the poor and hungry wolf that he was long ago. He went about the usual things he was scripted to do...

Wolfy reached Victoriana's house, blew it down with his huffing and puffing, and Victoriana waddled (she was too fat to run) squealing to Jane's house. Victoriana wasn't really afraid though, more excited as she had not been in the presence of a man for an EXTREMELY long time. She actually took the time to apply her sexiest red lipstick, and change into her shortest frilly skirt before waddling out of her house. While waddling,she took great efforts to sway her cellulite-infested bum seductively at wolfy!

One look at the wobbly blob of faded pink hussy had Wolfy's guts in a twist. He could have easily caught her if he bothered, but he couldn't bring himself to face the horrendous sight.

The same thing happened when Wolfy reached Jane's house. Two scantily clad fat old pigs wobbled their way pass him. Jane even looked back to throw him a suggestive wink, which caused Wolfy to throw up his lunch.

The funny thing was, he did not even have to threaten to blow down Jane's house, but the two of them wobbled out anyway. Looking at the marble walls, Wolfy thought it was just as well- he would have to borrow dynamite from Wile. E. Coyote to blow up those black marble walls...


Unknown "Lao maa" Adored - 16 years, 11 months, 16 days ago
Comments

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Unknown
That's alright, and thanks too!

Don't find intelligent tales around much, and I always appreciate a good read.

You have been given have a lovely day:).
Crafted by Unknown
Unknown Hopeless - 16 years, 4 months, 28 days ago
Unknown
Tre awesome tales (:
You have been given a surreal experience.
Crafted by Unknown
Unknown Hopeless - 16 years, 5 months, 16 days ago
Unknown
HANDS OFF MY LAO MA!
Unknown "Sonny" Purring - 16 years, 7 months, 4 days ago
iCez
hmmm... Can't believe cassy is here too!
iCez Tired - 16 years, 7 months, 4 days ago
Unknown
hello there!
Unknown "BRITNEY SPEARS" Thirsty - 16 years, 7 months, 16 days ago
Unknown
na
You have been given pato.
Crafted by
Unknown Abused - 16 years, 8 months, 21 days ago
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