A 6 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom.
"You know what? ' says the 6 year old. "I think it's about time we started cussing."
The 4 year old nods his head in approval.
The 6 year old continues, "When we go downstairs for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with 'hell' and you say something with 'ass'."
The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm.
When their mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what he wants for breakfast, she replies, "Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios."
WHACK!
She flies out of the chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, ge ts up and runs upstairs, crying her eyes out as her mother is in hot pursuit, slapping her rear at every step. Mom locks her in her room and shouts, "You can j ust
stay there until I let you out!"
She comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks, in a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young lady?"
"I don't know," she blubbers, "but you can bet your fat ass it won't be Cheerios."
Unknown "♥Yum Mum♥" Scared - 16 years, 7 months, 11 days ago

A fart it is a pleasant thing,

It gives the belly ease,

It warms the bed in winter,

And suffocates the fleas.








A fart can be quiet,

A fart can be loud,

Some leave a powerful,

Poisonous cloud



A fart can be short,

Or a fart can be long,

Some farts have been known

To sound like a song......







A fart can create

A most curious medley,

A fart can be harmless,

Or silent , and deadly.




A fart might not smell,

While others are vile,

A fart may pass quickly,

Or linger a while......



A fart can occur

In a number of places,

And leave everyone there,

With strange looks on their faces.



From wide-open prairie,

To small elevators,

A fart will find all of

Us sooner or later.




But farts are all bad,

Is simply not true-

We must never forget.......

Sweet old farts like you!

Unknown "♥Yum Mum♥" Scared - 16 years, 7 months, 11 days ago

6 TRUTHS OF LIFE

1. You cannot touch all your teeth with your tongue.

2. All idiots, after reading the first 'truth', will try it.

3. The first truth is a lie.

4. You are smiling now because you're an idiot.

5. You will soon forward this to another idiot.

6. There is still a stupid smile on your face.

I don't care if you lick windows, take the special bus,

or occasionally pee on yourself...


You hang in there sunshine, you're special and you are my friend.




Unknown "♥Yum Mum♥" Scared - 16 years, 7 months, 11 days ago

WE MADE IT TO ALBERTA....ALL IS WELL :)
Unknown "♥Yum Mum♥" Scared - 16 years, 7 months, 23 days ago

Well the truck that we have coming from Alberta to move us is currently stuck in Merritt due to the highway 5 being shut down. Totally not cool. That's a major bypass highway. So this is going to add a good hour or more to the drive. Plus the truck has used almost 400.00 bucks gas and that's with no load. So another 400.00 to get back and then our van is about 200.00 at least and then the ferry is 350.00....grand total of 1350.00.....my grandma only gave us 1000.00. So not cool. Starting to panic....majorly.
Unknown "♥Yum Mum♥" Scared - 16 years, 7 months, 26 days ago