I have this huge void within
So dark the ocean of empty
I am lost in that vast emptiness
Lost in the fog of identity
I get pain with all its costs
I live in the days gone by
The dreads getting closer everyday
Reaching the core of my spine
Inch by inch
I can smell it
I am lost in my own void
I am forever lost
No hope can come
And fool me again
This is who I am
This is where I will be
Till the end of days
Time has no meaning anymore
Cause justice died
The day I was born
You look at me with expectation
You have demands of life given
Not knowing what it is you see
Not seeing what I have seen
Thinking you know what’s going on
Like you have wore my shoes
You stand there watching
With your eyes
Demanding me to see
What you see
Where were your eyes
When they stole my childhood?
Where were your opinions
When they shattered my dreams
And took the core of my being
Away and tossed it
Who are you standing there
Thinking your wisdom should be mine
I didn’t see you around
While they executed me
No, I was all alone when
Rape knocked on my destiny
Or when war ruined my grounds
I didn’t hear your words
The day agony became my friend
Or feel your gentle touch
When the beating found my flesh
Where were you then?
Where was your wisdom?
Now you come to judge?
Just because you have had
Your own joys and agonies
Do not think at once
That you are familiar with me
I am the one feeling my pain
How will you assume
You have felt
What I feel?
Why don’t you weep
Out my anger?
You shake your head
When my knees are too weak
To bear the weight of my tears
Making me feel
Even more worthless
Asking me fake questions
“what’s the matter?”
Like you would have cared
Even if I was able to tell
Of my inner demons
I am not like you
I am not the guilt
I will no longer bear it
To in your world fit
My walls are red
My door is a window
My soft is broken
My hurt is loud
I am not like you
Never will I be
Maybe
If you just gave me a chance
I could find my peace
Discover my colours
Fill the ocean of empty
Maybe
If I consider my own demands
And find my own way
You and me can be
Living side by side
Cause I will not
Live your life
I will rather vanish
Into my own
And stop trying
To let the light in
It is not a matter of suicide
You can not take what you never had
I never had life
How you wanted me to
Copyright © Gazelle Pezeshkmehr
Unknown "Lady of Awesome" Cheeky
- 16 years, 9 months, 1 day ago