WISHING FOR THE DEAD... (poem)
We tend to wish for the things we can't have
The things we know we will never get
You never know what another person is wishing for
You never know what they really want when they say 'hello'
You think you can see into someones soul
Look into their eyes and think you know
Think you can feel what they feel
Kiss them deep and pretend they really want you
Kiss them hard and know they want something that's not you
Touch their skin and know it's dirtier than it looks
You want to feel good
Want to feel like you're loved
Want to feel like you are part of this world
But really you are just parting yourself even further
Further away from your wishes
Locking away the option of being something more
A wish is nothing more than that
A wish
Something you want
Something you dream about
Something you pray for
Something you know you can't have
I wish for love...
Wish for someone to hold me
For someone to know me
But it is nothing more than a wish
I kiss you and I feel nothing but disgust
Not with you but with myself
Have I really created the person I am
Have I really become someone who is willing to let themselves go
Someone who will do anything
Just to feel
Fallen to the lowest level there is
Sunk below the dirt
Not even worthy to be walked on
I'm the one they whisper about
The one you tell your kids to never become
The one little kids don't understand in the movies
"Why would someone do that to themselves?
Why don't they just see the light?
See that they are better than that?"
Well some people
They just aren't better than that
They aren't better than anything
I am one of those people
One of the ones who deserves everything that happens to them
I've never used someone
Or tried to hurt anyone
My intentions are good
My thoughts however impure
My dreams nothing more than lies
I will never know the sweet touch of love
Never know the feeling you can get on a warm spring day
Walking in the park with your lover
Never know
Never experience
Never feel
Never truely smile
My name does not fit
And my life is meant for someone else
I am nothing more than a figment
A figment of dreams long lost
A lesson
To never turn your back on what you know you can be
I am nothing
I am no one
I am simply imaginary
Like everything else
I am what I have made myself
And my world is what i have made it
Wishing hard for the things I can't have
Wishing to see what will never come into sight
Wishing for love
Wishing for friendship
Wishing for a future
Wishing for a dream long forgotten
I am nothing
I am no one
I have no worth
I have no vision
I am dead
Unknown "Smiles" Sexy
- 16 years, 10 months, 22 days ago