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Unknown
Unknown owns this human at 4225 points.
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Courageous
Unknown
Unknown
"Cleisthenes"



Name:
Unknown
Last login: over 3 weeks ago
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Herds: Kiwi Pets, Australian + New Zealand pets (O, N.Z sheep farm, NZ Pets, New Zealand Herd, ~NEW ZEALAND HERD~, kiwi's and rugby lover, New Zealand Herd, Long White Cloud, kiwihard

Unknown
Unknown
"cookie"
500 pts
Unknown's tales
1 2 Next
Unknown
Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?
JERRY FALWELL:
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side." That's what "they" call it: the "other side." Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side." That chicken should not be free to cross the road. It's as plain and simple as that.

KEN STARR:
I intend to prove that the chicken crossed the road at the behest of the President of the United States of America in an effort to distract law enforcement officials and the American public from the criminal wrongdoing our highest elected official has been trying to cover up. As a result, the chicken is just another pawn in the president's ongoing and elaborate scheme to obstruct justice and undermine the rule of law. For that reason, my staff intends to offer the chicken unconditional immunity provided he co-operates fully with our investigation. Furthermore, the chicken will not be permitted to reach the other side of the road until our investigation and any Congressional follow-up investigations have been completed. (We also are investigating whether Sid Blumenthal has leaked information to the Rev. Jerry Falwell, alleging the chicken to be homosexual in an effort to discredit any useful testimony the bird may have to offer, or at least to ruffle his feathers.)

PAT BUCHANAN:
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.

DR. SEUSS:
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes!
The chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed,
I've not been told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
To die. In the rain.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.:
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA:
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

ARISTOTLE:
It is in the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX:
It was a historical inevitability.

SADDAM HUSSEIN:
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

RONALD REAGAN:
What chicken?

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK:
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

FOX MULDER:
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?

FREUD:
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES:
I have just released eChicken 98, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook-and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

EINSTEIN:
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON:
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken please?

LOUIS FARRAKHAN:
The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.

THE BIBLE:
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

COLONEL SANDERS:
I missed one?

Unknown "Cleisthenes" Courageous - 16 years, 9 months, 29 days ago
Unknown
Surprise
One evening, as Uncle John and his wife are entertaining guests with cocktails, they are interrupted by an out-of breath little Johnny who shouts out, "Uncle John! Come quick! The bull is fucking the cow!" Uncle John, highly embarrassed, takes young little Johnny aside and explains that a certain decorum is required. "You should have said, 'The bull is surprising the cow'- not some filth you picked up in the City," he says. A few days later, little Johnny comes again as his uncle and aunt are entertaining. "Uncle John! The bull is surprising the cows!" The adults share a knowing grin. Uncle John says, "Thank you little Johnny, but surely you meant to say the cow, not COWS. A bull cannot 'surprise' more than one cow at a time you know." "Yes he can!" replies his obstinate nephew, "He's fucking the horse!"

Unknown "Cleisthenes" Courageous - 16 years, 9 months, 29 days ago
Unknown
Driving with Penguins
A man was driving down the road with twenty penguins in the back seat. The police stop him and say that he can't drive around with the penguins in the car and should take them to the zoo. The man agrees and drives off.
The next day the same man is driving down the road with twenty penguins in the back and again. He is stopped by the same police officer who says, "Hey! I though I told you to take those to the zoo."
The man replies "I did. Today I'm taking them to the movies."
Unknown "Cleisthenes" Courageous - 16 years, 9 months, 29 days ago
Unknown
Thumbs=Love... and i need a whole lot'a Luvin!! PLZZZZZZZ hehe
Cheers :P
Unknown "Cleisthenes" Courageous - 16 years, 10 months, 1 day ago
Unknown
UPSETTING THE STEWARDESS
On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped in next to him. He asks the stewardess for a coffee whereupon the parrot squawks, "And get me a coke, you cow!"
The stewardess, flustered, brings back a coke for the parrot and forgets the coffee.
When this omission is pointed out to her, the parrot drains its glass and bawls "And get me another coke dogface!"
Quite upset, the girl comes back shaking with another coke but still no coffee.
Unaccustomed to such slackness the man tries the parrot's approach. "I've asked you twice for a coffee! Go and get it now you old goat!"
The next moment both he and the parrot have been wrenched up and thrown out of the emergency exit by two burly stewards.
Plunging downwards the parrot turns to him and says, "For someone who can't fly, you've got some guts!"
Unknown "Cleisthenes" Courageous - 16 years, 10 months, 1 day ago
1 2 Next
Comments

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Alexander Graesser
random comment #389) *baked* You have been baked
Alexander Graesser "Flambeaux" gone! - 16 years, 2 months, 19 days ago
Unknown
Oh hey wow!
You is in auckland! =D
I was in Aucks today. <3
^-^
Unknown "7 LIL NZ CUTIE" Purring - 16 years, 6 months, 23 days ago
Unknown
hey pet owner!
it's been a while since we spoke ...
how's life?
x
You have been given Blow Kisses.
Crafted by
Unknown "C.M." Hungry - 16 years, 9 months, 11 days ago
Unknown
Hello my pet. Fancy a drink? Hope you're having a good day! Love from your owner, Weezle xoxo
You have been given Martinis for Two.
Crafted by
Unknown "Weezle" Nervous - 16 years, 9 months, 19 days ago
Kelly

You have been given A Hot Kiss.
Crafted by
Kelly "GCHQ Prism pet" Sleepy - 16 years, 9 months, 21 days ago
Unknown
;)
You have been given Follow Me.
Crafted by
Unknown "Slave girl" Sexy - 16 years, 9 months, 21 days ago
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Unknown's shop
Sacrafyc

BopiN PopiN ShoP DropiN!

Dont Steal My PET!!
1 use

200 pts
Dont Steal My PET!!
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I love you!!
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200 pts
I love you!!
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Clean Shaven Pussy Trim
1 use

200 pts
Clean Shaven Pussy Trim
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Fresh Pet food
1 use

250 pts
Fresh Pet food
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Gimmie a HUG!!
1 use

200 pts
Gimmie a HUG!!
Bought by 3 people
A good smelling!!
1 use

200 pts
A good smelling!!
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A Gravity Simulator!!
1 use

350 pts
A Gravity Simulator!!
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Given a 1hr Harley Davidson Ride
1 use

400 pts
Given a 1hr Harley Davidson Ride
Bought by 5 people
Heres some Nuts
1 use

250 pts
Heres some Nuts
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Harry Potter: Wats up Doc?!
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200 pts
Harry Potter: Wats up Doc?!
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Drunkin Pumpkin Head
1 use

300 pts
Drunkin Pumpkin Head
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Winked from a pussy!
1 use

250 pts
Winked from a pussy!
Bought by 14 people
Team Work!!
1 use

250 pts
Team Work!!
Bought by 3 people
Flee and Bug Pet Repelant!
1 use

250 pts
Flee and Bug Pet Repelant!
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