The Raven

ONCE upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary,
Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore,
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,
As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door.
" 'Tis some visiter," I muttered, "tapping at my chamber door —
Only this, and nothing more."

Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak December,
And each separate dying ember wrought its ghost upon the floor.
Eagerly I wished the morrow; — vainly I had sought to borrow
From my books surcease of sorrow — sorrow for the lost Lenore —
For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore —
Nameless here for evermore.

And the silken sad uncertain rustling of each purple curtain
Thrilled me — filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before;
So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating
" 'Tis some visiter entreating entrance at my chamber door —
Some late visiter entreating entrance at my chamber door; —
This it is, and nothing more."
Unknown "my london metal " Ferocious - 16 years, 1 month, 9 days ago

My Fav Quote:

"What isn`t remembered, never happened!"
Unknown "my london metal " Ferocious - 16 years, 1 month, 10 days ago

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN

Take off clothes and place them sectioned in the laundry basket according
to
lights and darks.
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
If you see husband/boyfriend along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts etc.
Get in the shower.
Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice
stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
Wash your hair again to make sure it is clean.
Condition your hair with conditioner enhanced with GRAPEFRUIT and mint.
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
Rinse conditioner off hair.
Shave armpits and legs.
Turn off shower.
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
Spray mould spots with tile cleaner.
Get out of shower.
Dry with towel the size of a small country.
Wrap hair in a super absorbent towel.
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and the hand towel on head.
If you see your husband /boyfriend along the way, cover up any exposed
areas.
Unknown "my london metal " Ferocious - 16 years, 9 months, 9 days ago

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave in a pile
on
the floor.
Walk naked to the bathroom.
If you see your girlfriend/wife along the way, shake willy at her making
the
"woo-woo" sound.
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
Admire the size of your willy and scratch your bum.
Get in the shower.
Wash yourface.
Wash your armpits.
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse it off.
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
Wash your bum, leaving those coarse bum hairs stuck on the soap.
Wash your hair.
Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
Pee.
Rinse off and get out of shower.
Partially dry off.
Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of bath the
whole time.
Admire willy size in mirror again.
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
If you pass girlfriend/ wife, pull off towel, shake willy at her and make
the "woo-woo" sound again.
Throw wet towel on bed.

I KNOW YOU'RE LAUGHING NOW BECAUSE MOST OF IT IS TRUE !
Unknown "my london metal " Ferocious - 16 years, 9 months, 9 days ago

SCORPIO (Oct. 24 - Nov. 21) --

HOLEE SHIT! here comes the masters and mistresses of FUCKing
Sorry Leo, but Scorps ARE the leaders in the Kink O Rama factor (Leos are in second place, so don't worry that much leos)
Scorpios KNOW how to seduce.
They KNOW what is kinky.
They are highly manipulative.
They KNOW how to get you to do what THEY want.
They KNOW how to fuck.
And they are making room for modifications.
All they have to do is walk into a room and look at you, and you WILL be on your back assuming the position.
Anne Rice (During her 'Beauty' phase) wants to be a Scorpio. Leos and Scorpios make for a fabulous tryst.they are the BEST in bed together..but if the emotions are not there then that's a different story. Don't dare TRY to make a Scorpio jealous...they will duct tape you to a chair and make you watch them fuck your boss..or your sister/brother..or Mother...hell, that's their idea of a typical normal Thursday night. They love to use gag balls. They always have carpet burns on their knees and back...this is from their constant rutting like a wild weasel in heat. They are also very cunning and secretive. They have a fetish for riding crops and bridles. Most Scorpios have mastered the Binaca Blowjob for heightened and elongated pleasure. I hope you can go the distance and can make them come...otherwise gods help ya.
Favorite Song: Master and Servant.
Most female Scorpios have a horrible tendency of being Alcohol Lesbians...get them drunk enough they will kiss a girl...or two....or three...or five....
but beware their sting!

Unknown "my london metal " Ferocious - 16 years, 9 months, 9 days ago