I greet you with dire news.

Moscow's plan for world domination is faltering. She has taken over most of Europe, mighty Africa also fell at her pretty feet. Asia succumbed to her charms like a daisy to the sunlight, however the Americas still elude her (I think it's because they're not very bright, or they eat too much corn syrup, one or the other).

We need your help. Pledge allegiance to Moscow now and together we can ensure that the world is hers. The globe will tremble in the wake of her black fluffy paws. Rivers shall halt with one twitch of her whiskers and the seas shall flow backwards as her tail wags.

You are called.

MOSCOW needs you!

Join now!

Join Moscow's arm today and together we can make the world a blacker place.

Unknown "Dark Angel" Ferocious - 16 years, 10 months, 9 days ago

Ladies, Gentlemen, my message is most important. Moscow, small black cat and evil genius, is intent on taking over the world. In order to help her in her mission, please buy goodies from my nasty supply shop.

Together we can make the world a blacker place.

This message is brought to you by Moscow For World Leader Inc.
Unknown "Dark Angel" Ferocious - 16 years, 10 months, 13 days ago