Texas, the only state ballsy enough to have its own toast
Unknown "Get in There" Wild - 16 years, 2 months ago

Throwing up apples tastes like applesauce
Unknown "Get in There" Wild - 16 years, 3 months, 29 days ago

I'm pretty happy with my playlist.....but it could always be better...Couple bands to check out, Cloud Cult and The Hold Steady
Unknown "Get in There" Wild - 16 years, 4 months, 3 days ago

So, I'm driving down the highway with my buddy the other week after a long day of work and was need of a good laugh, little did I know one lay about a mile ahead.
First of all, I want to complain about the new body style of the Mitsubishi Eclipse....they took away the cool body kit with the aerodynamic lines on the sides, rounded out the front and back more making it look more like a bubble than a car, basically it looks like some generic chick car now (no offense) where it used to be both sexes could enjoy it without ambiguity, shame on you Mitsubishi, back to the story at hand.
As we're pulling around a bend, we see one of these new Eclipses ahead, silver to be exact, and my complaints start to flow, I am pleased to hear that my buddy, Jim, feels the same way I do. As we get closer, we see the owner of the car has felt it appropriate to further deface this car with at least eight to ten stickers of some sort along the backside of the car including the bumper, back window and trunk areas of the car, with one fairly larger, blue sticker with white lettering. Here in Austin, there is a record store Waterloo, whose bumper stickers look just like the blue one, they are fairly popular, so I assume it is that....how wrong I was.
Upon getting even closer behind the car, we see the multiple smaller stickers on the back (now wrapping around the car on the sides we have discovered) are those cheesy devil pin-up girl stickers favored by adolescent boys and douche bag rednecks around the world. These devil women have the typical over sized breasts, sultry looks and alluring poses found on the classy girls of Swank Magazine. The driver (whom we had not seen yet) proudly displays these stickers all around his car, with even a couple on his windshield if I remember properly, basically highlighting the one large blue and white sticker.
Finally we pull up close enough to read the message on that blue and white sticker, proudly displaying that the driver is not a patron of Waterloo records, saying nothing about world peace, politics, his honor student, or anything about Texas, but simply letting us know his eating habits
"Vaginatarian" ............ wow
Needless to say, this guy must get laid all the time with such suave and deb oner about him, so I had to see the seventeen year old driving for myself. As we pull along side, an arm comes out the driver side window, not one belonging to some pimply faced high-schooler, but a meaty arm that only a competitive eating champion would be proud of. Attached to this arm was probably the worst Hawaiian shirts, bad sunglasses, pretty sure I saw a gold bracelet there all belonging to probably a fifty year old man with hair grayer than the back of my grandmother's knees. Worst midlife crises ever. I'm pretty sure that all the strippers at the local club know this guy by name and he spends most of his money made at the used car lot on them.
So here's to you "Vaginatarian," making guys like me look even better.
Unknown "Get in There" Wild - 16 years, 7 months, 20 days ago

Life's goal:
Punch a dolphin in the face
Unknown "Get in There" Wild - 16 years, 8 months, 17 days ago