You could always thumb my thumbing herd... http://humanpets.com/herdProfile.php?hid=18249
:)
Unknown "n0" Loving - 16 years, 11 months, 10 days ago

Andy went down to the local river yesterday. The river water sparkled in the bright sunlight. It was like being in the country, except for the distant hum of cars from the city. He saw a snake curling up under a rock, so of course he poked the rock with a stick. The snake flew out and slid into the water. It swam up and down the river, fighting the river current. It was a small yellowish river snake that looked quite young. It jumped out of the water on to the rocks and freaked out Andy, who ran away. The end.
Unknown "n0" Loving - 16 years, 11 months, 14 days ago

Once upon a time Andy decided to find a job in Melbourne. There were many, many jobs, but he kept getting rejected. Well, until one day when he found a job ad that made his eyes sparkle with joy and so he applied for the job. While at the interview the employers just tossed all the other resumes in the bin after seeing his eye's filled with pure joy (a threesome out the back may have also been involved, but that is just speculation). Andy was now a Tram driver - a driver of a certain type of light-rail, halfway between a train and a bus, which doesn't exist much outside Melbourne. On his first day he chose route 86 up trendy Smith St, but it wasn't as easy as it seemed. After leaving Burke and even before getting to Smith St, he ran into all sorts of trouble. He closed the door on a chubby man loading a large box of donuts onto the tram. He also had a dog leash stuck in a door, with the old lady carrying the leash inside the tram and the leashed dog outside the tram, but no-one pushed the button or said anything for three stops, so the dog had to run beside the tram. He slammed the breaks to miss a cat running in front of the tram, causing 3 children to fly from one end of the tram to the other. He somehow drove off the tracks, overtook a Pajero, then by a shear luck managed to safely drive back on the tracks. At Smith St the real trouble occurred. A car cut him off, but he didn't break and slammed right into the back of the car. The car was carrying large quantities of illegal drugs in the boot of the car, which flew into the air upon impact. All of a sudden a scary load of old dirty smelly Fitzroy hippys and zombie-now-come-to-life junkies made a mad rush to the drugs and snatched them all up. When the police arrived there were no drugs left, just some hippys off their face, a smashed up car and Andy in the drivers seat of the tram. Andy lost his job, but didn't go to jail, because he gave the police a large box of donuts. And that was the story of when Andy drove a tram.
Unknown "n0" Loving - 16 years, 11 months, 18 days ago

One day Andy was bored and sitting at home, playing with the Internet. He said, "F*** this I'm outta here!" and drove to the airport. He boarded an airplane travelling to Shanghai, China. They where all like "你好！" and he replied "很好！" Life was good again. But then he couldn't afford accommodation, so he started living on the streets. He started selling Jaozi on the side of the road on Heping Dadao. He became incredibly popular, because he was the only non-Chinese guy to ever sell food on the street. He was the biggest freak show ever. It didn't last long though, because he became too popular and his business became huge. He even stealing everyone's business by franchising everyone's businesses through a national corporation and was ready to go global. The Chinese Jaozi makers were angry and formed an unofficial Jaozi workers association. They had secret talks with the Communist party and stole Andy's business from under him, then claimed it as their own. Andy was deported back home and Immigration forced him to pay for his own flight home. He was dead poor again. The End.
Unknown "n0" Loving - 16 years, 11 months, 29 days ago