“Brace yourself.”
You can find anything on TV.
They sell cars, navigational systems for the cars,
Special gas for you cars, and motor oils, and
Whole bloody websites for cars, and radios for cars, and
Engines and tires and buildings dedicated to making
Sure your car runs properly,
When you’re on your way to nowhere.
“But where can I find a car that can get me off the ground?
I want black holes, I want shooting stars and skyrockets and
Galaxies filled with slowly moving rocks going at the speed of light,
And….”
And you can find any kind of phone.
The wireless kind, or the ones that come attached to walls
And there are family plans, and
Select five, so people can feel left out from a distance
When you chatter to them. Little voices coming from
A tinny sounding metal box, it’s nowhere near as
Good as skin.
“ … And they sell people too. Those guys in those ads that
Come when you purchase some plan from some company
Who are there in case you have no one to talk to
Through that phone of yours.
Because all we really want with those phones is to
Not feel quite so lonely, and…”
And they sell pills that will make you skinny,
And diet plans that will make you slim,
And gyms that will make you slight,
And low calorie foods that will make you feel light
And weightless, and nonexistent and hollow,
But thin.
“… And my mom was watching with me some times, and she
Plays with my hair in that way that makes me want to fall asleep,
And I know she wants to be skinny like those perfect little
Blonde women in the commercials. I think she was beautiful once,
Before age and stress and pressure and work set in.
Now she’s just a joke for kids to mock when she comes to school,
A joke for me to be embarrassed to be seen with, and horrified to be
Embarrassed by, and I know because I’ve heard her crying at
Night sometimes when she thinks I’m asleep, and…”
And there’s music too, with videos filled with
Bright lights and noise and women and men
And bare bodies and water and someone is singing about
How they keep bleeding, they keep, keep bleeding,
And some boy is telling me that he knows that
After tonight you won’t have to look up
At the stars no more, no.
And another woman is shrilling on about how
She say those picture of him with her, and
How she was so sad that he didn’t love her the same
And in the video I’m pretty sure she kills him.
“… And then Jason Mraz came on with some song about
How he couldn’t wait, and oh, I’m yours, and I
Almost smiled at that, but I remembered that
You weren’t there to smile at, and that
For all the shit commercials can give me, I can’t buy
You back with a simple phone call, so I guess I’ll have to
Keep on Chasing Pavements, even if it goes nowhere,
And wish for a car that can take me to my star when they
Skyrocket away, so I think I turned off the TV, and I
Stared at the corner where the wall meets the ceiling, and
I thought about being lonely and girls carving halves of
Broken hearts into their too-thin-thighs, but mostly
I just missed you.”
Unknown "Mon petite" Uncertain
- 16 years, 4 months, 27 days ago
