'Kay, so I was eating a bowl of dry Froot Loops the other day (hardcore, I know), an' I was eating them one colour at a time.
Obvs.
I started with the green ones, because everyone hates the green ones. In everything. Ew, they just totally aren't the best. 'Asides, they totally don't fit in with the rest of the Fruit Loop colour scheme.
So I was eating my green Froot Loops, when I noticed that some of the yellow ones are slightly greenish!
Lyk, whaa'?!
There had been dark green an' LIGHT green the whole time an' I didn't notice? Amazing. Truly amazing.
So I ate the dark green ones, then started on the light green ones. I was all proud of myself that I figured out that there WERE light green ones.
After a while, it starts to become harder to pick out the light green ones from the yellow ones. /Some/ of the light green ones were SO OBVIOUSLY green, it was impossible to mistake them as yellow. But SOME of them were BARELY not yellow, so you have to directly compare them to tell the difference. It was really very time consuming.
So fine, I was frustrated. The Fruit Loops had gotten the better of me.
But what's this?
I don't admit defeat /that/ easily.
BWAHAHAHA! *GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE*
TAKE /THAT/ EVIL YELLOW AN' GREEN FRUIT LOO-
...
Shit.
Some of those yellow ones weren't completely yellow. I /thought/ I was /winning/ by eating all the yellow ones /with/ the green ones. (Hahaha, BEEETCH. See if I care that you're different colours.)
Turns out there are MORE than two shades of yellow.
Not only is there yellow.
Not only is their yellowish-GREEN, oh no.
Ohhh, no.
To put it simply?
Yellowish-orange.
I about had a mental breakdown.
The yellowish-orange were even HARDER to differentiate from the yellow ones.
Sigh.
Now, I do NOT count eating all the yellow ones an' the yellowish-orange ones together as a victory. No, /that/ is giving in.
God damn Fruit Loops think they can beat me?
HAH.
You just try.

But wait...
I thought the colours were green, yellow, orange, pink, an' purple.
Turns out there were two colours I didn't even know about.
Oh...
Oh dear god, no...
I looked back at my bowl.
Squinted my eyes... Stared closely at the Fruit Loops...
Fuck.
There's red too. The perfect combination of orange an' pink. Too perfect. This seemingly innocent bowl of Fruit Loops has turned into a big project.
Alright, alright. I can do this.
I will win.
Those fucking Fruit Loops will not, CAN NOT, get the better of me.
*Munch munch*
So I've finally gotten past the yellowish-orange, an' to the orange. I've taken MUCH CARE into eating the orange before the red. I finally get down to the red, carefully separate them from the pink, when I realize that the purple ones aren't all purple.
Some of them are PINKISH-purple, for gods sake.
PINKISH FUCKING PURPLE.
I swear to god, I was having the biggest fucking meltdown in the history of breakfast cereals.
Then who knows how long later, I've managed to pick out all the pinkish purple ones.
FINALLY.
FUCKING ECSTASY.
ONLY THE PURPLE ONES ARE LEFT.
But wait.
Oh, you've got to be kidding.
What do you think I find at the bottom of my bowl of perfect purple Fruit Loops?
A GREEN ONE.
A DARK GREEN FRUIT LOOP.
My life is over.
Sob.
Unknown "Paperclip" Hopeless - 16 years, 3 months, 5 days ago

Right, so, I've been really depressed lately. It's long an' confusing an' hard to explain, really, but to sum it up, everything that's worth doing isn't worth the effort, an' time slips by while I decide.
My biggest fear is time, you see. Actually, hmm. I'd say my biggest fear is being /alone/, but it kind of goes with time. Like, forever. I'm afaird of forever. The unknown! I'm afraid of the future. Yeah, that's it. But the scariest part is that you can't get AWAY from the future. It just keeps coming. It's not like spiders, or needles (which I'm also afraid of) because those are avoidable. it's the kind of fear that never goes away because it never stops. I live in constant fear. Do you have any idea what that's like? I don't think you would.

I'm afraid of growing up. I won't be able to function on my own. Like... Ok, when you're little? Your mom asks you to wipe off the table. So you wipe the crumbs onto the floor, an' you're done with it. You were supposed to wipe off the TABLE, it's not YOUR job to sweep the floor. But when you're by YOURSELF, who's gonna sweep the floor when you wipe crumbs onto it? You are, that's who. You have no one to help you, no support. I don't want to move out, go live by myself.
Not like I want to be some 30 year old loser who lives in her parents basement.
Suicide: A little something I'd like to call "Neverland".
Originally, (last year) I figured rather than rushing into things, I'd waituntil my 20th birthday, an' never leave my teen years. Stay a kid forever, right? But lately, that just seems much too long. So, by not living past HIGH SCHOOL, I can stay a kid forever an' NEVER have to be alone, either. Kill two birds with one stone, eh?

Graduation night.
End school with a bang.
Unknown "Paperclip" Hopeless - 16 years, 3 months, 12 days ago

'Kay, so I'm like, visiting my grandma in New York. It's so WEIRD here.

PEOPLE LOOK AT YOU TOO MUCH.
 I'M LIKE STANDING ON THE STREET AN' THEY LOOK AT ME AN' THEYRE ALL LIKE "HAHAHA I'M LOOKING AT YOU AN' YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M THINKING ABOUT YOU BEHIND YOUR BACK IN MY HEAD!" An' then they NOTICE that you notice them looking at you, an' they like, glare at you for a second like "HOW DARE YOU LOOK AT ME LOOKING AT YOU, YOU PERV!" An' then they look away like "Haha, bitch- I just finished LOOKING at you!" It's really nerve wracking x.X

Unknown "Paperclip" Hopeless - 16 years, 4 months, 4 days ago