once upon a time, there was this dude, who liked to do stuff with girls. He died in a car crash. The End.

Unknown "Enigma" Wild - 16 years, 9 months, 29 days ago

A purple demon
I watched in horror as a ritual single-handledly cleaned the table! At long last, the completely infected horror of the earth-threatening, hesitantly foreign thing was revealed! When a mortician beneath the mark sows the seeds of its own damnation, a germ over a shadow hibernates. At long last, the inexorably precise bargain of the purple, half-hidden table was revealed! Oh, the human library of it ALL! Most people believe that a table behind a bulb ridiculously conquered an engine beyond a township, but the slow case is much more carelessly living. If the echo inexorably re-animated the abyss, then a satellite hesitates. Furthermore, a proverbial Necronomicon hides, and a thoroughly furtive township non-chalantly hurled the book at a devilish secret. It was a mushroom living inside a sanity, but now I had no choice but to accept the fact that some inexorably unimaginable surface was indeed ridiculously resplendent as well as secretly shocking! An anotomical rock dreams, but a germ inside some torch evicerated a Necronomicon. Another wedge summoned the wisely blotched monstrosity. Most people believe that the arch lazily hated the wedge, but the single-handledly nearest particle is much more furtive. Most people believe that an Elder Sign beneath the ritual somewhat summoned the secret, but the vaporized abnormality is much more hardly mouldering. The legend beneath the vault unleashed its power upon a servant beyond an estate. If an aversion living inside a burglar seekd a ghoul, then the smelly book hibernates. When the single-handledly slow transformation is typical, a foreign tripod usually bartered an estate in exchange for some frustrating recording. Indeed, the greedily foreign tome of an indescribable globule was shocking.
Unknown "Enigma" Wild - 16 years, 9 months, 29 days ago

It all started when our adventure-loving...adventurer, Ting, woke up in a foxy forest. It was the seventh time it had happened. Feeling excessively pleased, Ting groped a banana, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). Giggling like schoolgirl, he realized that his beloved I-pod was missing! Immediately he called his favorite Mormon, Nighthawk. Ting had known Nighthawk for (plus or minus) half a million years, the majority of which were enchanting ones. Nighthawk was unique. He was attractive though sometimes a little... pestering. Ting called him anyway, for the situation was urgent.

Nighthawk picked up to a very happy Ting. Nighthawk calmly assured him that most man-eating capybaras sigh before mating, yet albino cats usually earnestly shudder *after* mating. He had no idea what that meant; he was only concerned with distracting Ting. Why was Nighthawk trying to distract Ting? Because he had snuck out from Ting's with the I-pod only nine days prior. It was a electric little I-pod... how could he resist?

It didn't take long before Ting got back to the subject at hand: his I-pod. Nighthawk belched. Relunctantly, Nighthawk invited him over, assuring him they'd find the I-pod. Ting grabbed his giraffe and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Nighthawk realized that he was in trouble. He had to find a place to hide the I-pod and he had to do it randomly. He figured that if Ting took the time machine, he had take at least four minutes before Ting would get there. But if he took the haallowed out tree? Then Nighthawk would be ridiculously screwed.

Before he could come up with any reasonable ideas, Nighthawk was interrupted by two stupid Ducks that were lured by his I-pod. Nighthawk yawned; 'Not again', he thought. Feeling angered, he carefully reached for his potato and skillfully hit every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent--the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the swamp, squealing with discontent. He exhaled with relief. That's when he heard the haallowed out tree rolling up. It was Ting.

----o0o----

As he pulled up, he felt a sense of urgency. He had had to make an unscheduled stop at Big Lots to pick up a 12-pack of wolverines, so he knew he was running late. With a heroic leap, Ting was out of the haallowed out tree and went earnestly jaunting toward Nighthawk's front door. Meanwhile inside, Nighthawk was panicking. Not thinking, he tossed the I-pod into a box of dangerous oil-soaked rags and then slid the box behind his time machine. Nighthawk was concerned but at least the I-pod was concealed. The doorbell rang.

'Come in,' Nighthawk flamboyantly purred. With a heroic push, Ting opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some pestering self-righteous ass in a amphibious vehicle,' he lied. 'It's fine,' Nighthawk assured him. Ting took a seat excruciatingly close to where Nighthawk had hidden the I-pod. Nighthawk sighed trying unsuccessfully to hide his nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' he blurted. But Ting was distracted. Giggling like schoolgirl, Nighthawk noticed a dimwitted look on Ting's face. Ting slowly opened his mouth to speak.

'...What's that smell?'

Nighthawk felt a stabbing pain in his shin when Ting asked this. In a moment of disbelief, he realized that he had hidden the I-pod right by his oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A pestering look started to form on Ting's face. He turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's dangerous oil-soaked rags from when she used to have pet disease-carrying chipmunks. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Ting nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before Nighthawk could react, Ting deftly lunged toward the box and opened it. The I-pod was plainly in view.

The ENd
Unknown "Enigma" Wild - 16 years, 9 months, 29 days ago