Several years ago, a primary student in my school was sent to see the principal for misbehaving in the classroom. The principal was very upset to see this same young man in his office again (because he seemed to be there quite often). After talking sternly to the boy for a few minutes and reprimanding him, the principal gave the boy this warning, "The next time you come to my office... I guess I'm going to have to get out my paddle!" Without blinking an eye, the confused boy replied, "You have a boat?"...
Unknown "Goober Baby" Lonely - 16 years, 8 months, 9 days ago

Little Johnny walked into his kindergarten room one morning wearing shoes that were at least 6 sizes too big. The teacher looked at him and asked "Johnny, who's shoes are you wearing?". Johnny smiled back and said proudly "my big brother's". The teacher, still puzzled asked, "Does your mother know you have your brother's shoes on?" Johnny replied " YES she does, she's the one who said I could wear them". The teacher is now really confused so she has to ask "Why did your mother tell you to wear your brother's shoes?" Johnny said with a grin, "because he buried MINE in the back yard!!"

Unknown "Goober Baby" Lonely - 16 years, 8 months, 9 days ago

We were doing a science lesson on how plants grow. The children all got a chance to plant their own seeds. As the teacher I planted a few extra seeds for the children whose plants do not sprout. After a few weeks of watching them I secretly exchanged a few. The next day one of my students said "Look teacher, it's a miracle, my plant is growing". I said "Yes, seeds sprouting is very exciting". He said," No teacher, that's not the miracle, I ATE the SEED and it is growing anyway!"

Unknown "Goober Baby" Lonely - 16 years, 8 months, 9 days ago

One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of the Three Little Pigs to her class. She came to the part of the story where the first pig was trying to accumulate the building materials for his home. She read, "...And so the pig went up to the man with the wheelbarrow full of straw and said, "Pardon me sir, but may I have some of that straw to build my house?'" The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that man said?" One little boy raised his hand and said, "I think he said 'Holy %$#@! A talking pig!'" The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.
Unknown "Goober Baby" Lonely - 16 years, 8 months, 9 days ago

I teach preschool, 2 year olds. When I was Pregnant with my 3rd child, I saw no reason to tell my class because they were so young. As the year was coming to an end, I grew quite large. One of my little darlings came up to me and said," Miss Ilene, your belly is getting very fat!" I asked this little boy if he'd like to know why, and he said yes. I told him I had a baby in my tummy. He walked away, saying nothing. The next day, this happy, never cry child pitched a fit when his mother tried to leave. She pulled him aside and they talked for a few minutes, and the little boy calmed down, and the mom was grinning from ear to ear. I asked what happened and she said, "Adam thought you might eat him, you've already eaten a baby."
Unknown "Goober Baby" Lonely - 16 years, 8 months, 9 days ago