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"Lord Fing Foamy!"



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Unknown's tales
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Unknown
Sorry, guys,
girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I
cant figure out why the connection breaks down
between what they say "I want a nice guy!" and what
they do "Im going to sleep with this complete ass
now!"(Well, maybe they want a man who knows how to stand up for themselves). But one thing I can do, is say that the
nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesnt last
forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out
of that train of thought and realize they should be
dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The
tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier,
finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to
all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know
youre sick of hearing yourself described as
ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the
world needs your patience in the department store,
your holding open of doors, your party escorting
services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty
smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you
tolerate, for all the situations where you are the
faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my
acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You
do have credibility in this society, and your well
deserved vindication is coming.

(The world may need nice guys, but it also seems like the nice guys this silly bastard has described need to gain some self confidence, self respect, and the testicular fortitude to stand up for themselves. Being a nice guy is great, but being a spineless pushover means noone, especially the women who seem to ignore you, will ever give you respect)

Original author Unknown
Angry additions by Lord Fing Foamy- Cory D.
Unknown "Lord Fing Foamy!" Rabid - 16 years, 10 months, 7 days ago
Unknown
This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on
your cell phone, and when you called her back, she
spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two
sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner(Congratulations! You have allowed yourself to become one of her girlfriends!If being subjected to this kind of conversation really bothers you, grow a pair and tell her that). And
even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and
a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she
shouldn't worry about it(Now you have gone from a woman, to being a complete idiot! If you really think her boyfriend is a tool, let her read whatever she wants into his stupid comments. Unless you think it's a good idea for two people who don't get along to stay together.) This is for that time she
interrupted the best killing spree you'd ever
orchestrated in Halo2 to rant about a rumor that
romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the
most repulsive person in the world (I'm sorry, but that should never happen. Anyone that addicted to a game will either not answer or talk while playing). And even though
you thought it was immature and you had nothing
against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and
helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around
the floor(Good job, now you've become her bitchy girlfriend! Even if she has seen you naked, she will never believe that you have a penis!). This is also for that time she didn't have
a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing
serious between the two of you, she dragged you to a
party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and
she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit
of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: oh,
but were just friends! And even though you were
invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego,
you went anyways. Because you're nice like that (No, this did not happen because "you're nice like that." It happened because you have no spine, no balls, and no life of your own. The only way any other man can respect you is if you say the only reason you went was to try to get her drunk, because she has a tendency to get naked in public once she's shitfaced).

The nice guys don't often get credit where credit is
due (No, that's spineless pushovers). And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don't
seem to get laid as often as they should (They do if they aren't as stupid or stubborn as you are). And I wish I
could logically explain this trend, but I cant (As I said before, it is because of your stupidity). From
what I have observed on campus and what I have learned
from talking to friends at other schools and in the
workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many
girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches (Or maybe you are just a spineless, idiotic pussy). Many
of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but
when presented with such a specimen, they say
irrational, confusing things such as oh, hes too
nice to date or he would be a good boyfriend but
hes not for me or he already puts up with so much
from me, I couldn't possibly ask him out! or the most
frustrating of all: no, it would ruin our
friendship. (Okay, you've got one good point here. The "too nice" one seems a bit illogical to me, but the others are all valid. But most of those are another way for a woman to politely say they are not interested. Deal with the rejection, dumb-ass!) Yet, they continue to lament the lack of
datable men in the world, and they expect their
too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and
apologize for the men that are jerks (Or maybe that's a subtle clue that you need to grow a pair and stop being a pushover and make a move).
Unknown "Lord Fing Foamy!" Rabid - 16 years, 10 months, 7 days ago
Unknown
(Here's something completely re-fucking-tarded that I'm sure everyone has seen on myspace at some point. It needs to be stopped. I have been called a nice guy, so I figure I have some credibility in refuting some of these stupid things this sad bastard decided to infect the universe with.)


Because this is true for the nice girl's too.
This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that
finish last (This did not need to be said. Everyone has heard that fucking cliché!), that never become more than friends (If you aren't more than a friend to someone, then either you need to actually make a move or just deal with the fact that you and the other person aren't a good match for each other.) , that
endure hours of whining and bitching about what
assholes guys are, while disproving the very point (Again, this didn't need to be said. This is another cliche that is well known. Get an original thought, fucker!)
This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a
shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to
tentative hugs (So you want credit for not taking advantage of confusing, highly emotional situations? Doesn't work that way shit-head!), those guys who hold open doors (That's being polite, not necessarily "nice." Even a complete asshole can do that!) and
give reassuring pats on the back (Again, even assholes can do this. Sometimes they do this just to set the ground work for future torment, manipulation and fucking, depending on the situation.) and sit patiently
outside the changing room at department stores (This is being more of a doormat. If you are shopping with a friend, you have every right to go do something else while they are trying stuff on.) This
is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how
cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends
are at the appropriate moment because they know most
girls need that litany of support This is in honor of
the guys with open minds (But who are too stubborn to realize when they aren't really who the other person wants or needs?), with laid-back attitudes (But who get obsessed with someone they can't have?) ,
with honest concern (But not enough honesty to just tell someone how you feel instead of just waiting for them to want you?). This is in honor of the guys who
respect a girls every facet, from her privacy to her
theology to her clothing style (Just not the fact that they don't want you, right?).

This is for the guys who escort their drunk,
bewildered female friends back from parties and never
take advantage once they're at her door (Now you think you should get credit for not being a date rapist?!?), for the guys
who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the
rest of the creepy male population (Or because you're secretly hoping that she'll get drunk enough that she'll fuck you, since you don't have the balls to make a move while she's sober) for the guys who
know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them
out anyway (You would probably be better off calling that insecure girl on it. She may only see you as a friend because she doesn't think the compliments are genuine anymore), for the guys who always play by the rules
in a game where the rules favor cheaters (The RULES do not ever favor cheaters, that's what cheating is, going against the rules for an unfair advantage. Besides, if playing honestly isn't working, try cheating or play a different game!) for the guys
who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow
dont end up being boyfriends (Probably because they don't go after the people who really want them or have thew balls to make a move), for all the nice guys
who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated (That happens to everyone to some extent),
for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and
unjustly abandoned (Oh, so you mean spineless doormats who can't stick up for themselves in any way shape or form?), this is for you.


Unknown "Lord Fing Foamy!" Rabid - 16 years, 10 months, 7 days ago
Unknown


Top 25 things that make me happy

1. Jesse
2. Sexin'
3. Kissing
4. Booze
5. Cuddlin'
6. Movies.
7. Video Games
8. Porn
9. Cheese
10. Internets
11. Music
12. Pasta
13. Ice Cream
14. Books
15. TV
16. Moneys
17. No More Navy!
18. Potatoes
19. Nachos
20. Sodas
21. Muffins
22. Pizza
23. My trenchcoat
24. Fucked up shirts
25. Chill-the-fuck-out-pills (Lorazepam)
Unknown "Lord Fing Foamy!" Rabid - 16 years, 10 months, 7 days ago
Unknown
Silly God Chain letter with my comments added

..>..>

Body: Why do we sleep in church,
But stay awake through a 2 hour movie?
(because movies have a variety of stories, but you hear pretty much the same shit every Sunday at church. Plus, movies have explosions!!)

Why is it so hard to talk about God,
but so easy to talk about sex?
(it's actually just as easy to talk about God, but it's exceedingly less entertaining than talking about sex. Seriously, which would you rather hear about, my take on the parable of the prodigal son, or about the threesome I had?)

Why are we so bored when we look at a Christian magazine,
but find it easy to read Playboy?
(Because Christian magazines are mostly articles, where as Playboy is full of images specifically crafted to capture the attention, through both camera work and titties)

Why is it so easy to ignore a Godly myspace message,
Yet we repost the nasty ones?
(Again, the Christian ones are boring, or at best, so unbelievable that we can not take them seriously)

Why are churches getting smaller,
But bars and clubs are growing?
(Because churches only let you have enough alcohol in the wine they serve to cause a headache, but at bars/clubs you can get nice and shitfaced. Plus there is an insanely increased chance of getting laid at the bar/club)

Think about it, are you going to repost this?
Are you going to ignore it, cause you think you'll get laughed at?
(I reposted WITH THE INTENTION of having it laughed at, douche!)


Repost this as ".Don't read if you're under 13...seriously"

80 % of you wont repost this. (Ha, proved you wrong, bitch! I reposted, you r-tard)

Jesus said:
"If you deny me in front of your friends,
I will deny you in front of my father
Unknown "Lord Fing Foamy!" Rabid - 16 years, 10 months, 7 days ago
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Comments

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Unknown

You have been given Getting Sexed? (Firefly).
Crafted by Nic
Unknown "Meowgasmic " Playful - 15 years, 12 months ago
Unknown

You have been given Red wine intravenous.
Crafted by Poizon Barbie
Unknown "Meowgasmic " Playful - 15 years, 12 months ago
Unknown
What she said!
You have been given the bus that killed Jesus.
Crafted by Unknown
Unknown "Pajama Monster " NO! - 16 years, 6 months, 6 days ago
Unknown
great shop xD
You have been given Ha ha! ...Oh wait... DAMMIT! @#%.
Crafted by Unknown
Unknown NinJa CaNdiLiCiOuS ³ - 16 years, 6 months, 21 days ago
Nicola Fitzharris
Ur shop is f*cking awesome... been sitting here giggling
You have been given Jazz hands!!!.
Crafted by Nicola Fitzharris
Nicola Fitzharris "Mrs McWifey" Adored - 16 years, 6 months, 22 days ago
heather galyean
*laughs* your shop is hilarious.. i'll have to come back and buy some of that when ive got more points. Don't let me forget!
heather galyean "precious pet" Naughty - 16 years, 7 months ago
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Unknown's shop
Foamy's Nifty Crap



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