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Unknown
Unknown owns this human at 22378 points.
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Playful

Unknown
"Mine ~Bat~ Man"



Name:
Unknown, 57/Male
Last login: over 3 weeks ago
Local time:6:30 AM
Join date:16 years, 3 months, 15 days ago
Location: Baltimore United States

""...and I'm proud to be an American!...""
About me:
Been in Maryland for the last 2 years after 7 years in Ohio. Just retired from the Air Force and am starting a new chapter in my life; originally from San Antonio, TX...active in sports, karaoke, the Opera and my kids lives. So needless to say I have diverse tastes and activities.
I love movies and trivia...swimming, golf and softball; Steelers, Redsox, Spurs, & Avs (needless to say it's been a pretty good run the last few years).
About you:
Well, meeting Kylie Minogue is a dream but if you are close then that's a plus. :)
Looking for: Friendship and dating
Orientation: Straight
Herds: THONGS & FRENCH KNICKERS, United States of America lovers, Have You

Unknown
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"Kentucky Babe"
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"Dotti"
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Unknown's tales
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Unknown
This test only has one question, but it's a very important one. By giving an honest answer, you will discover where you stand morally.

The test features an unlikely, completely fictional situation in which you will have to make a decision. Remember that your answer needs to be honest, yet spontaneous.

Please scroll down slowly and give due consideration to each line.

THE SITUATION:
You are in Florida, Miami to be specific. There is chaos all around you caused by a hurricane with severe flooding. This is a flood of biblical proportions.

You are a photojournalist working for a major newspaper, and you're caught in the middle of this epic disaster. The situation is nearly hopeless. You're trying to shoot career-making photos.

There are houses and people swirling around you, some disappearing under the water. Nature is unleashing all of its destructive furor.

THE TEST:
Suddenly you see a woman in the water. She is fighting for her life, trying not to be taken down with the debris.

You move closer.

Somehow the woman looks familiar. You suddenly realize who it is. It's Hillary Clinton!

At the same time you notice that the raging waters are about to take her under forever.

You have two options:

You can save the life of Hillary Clinton, or - - - you can shoot a dramatic Pulitzer Prize winning photo, documenting the death of one of the world's most powerful and brilliant women.

THE QUESTION:
Here's the question, and please give an honest answer....


Would you select high contrast color film, or would you go with the classic simplicity of black and white?



Unknown "Mine ~Bat~ Man" Playful - 16 years, 6 days ago
Unknown
ONE SUNDAY, IN COUNTING THE MONEY IN THE WEEKLY
OFFERING, THE PASTOR OF A
SMALL CHURCH FOUND A PINK ENVELOPE CONTAINING
$1,000. IT HAPPENED AGAIN THE
NEXT WEEK.

THE FOLLOWING SUNDAY, HE WATCHED AS THE OFFERING
WAS COLLECTED AND SAW A
LITTLE OLD LADY PUT THE DISTINCTIVE PINK ENVELOPE
IN THE PLATE. THIS WENT ON
FOR WEEKS UNTIL THE PASTOR, OVERCOME BY
CURIOSITY, APPROACHED HER.

"MA'AM, I COULDN'T HELP BUT NOTICE THAT YOU PUT
$1,000 A WEEK IN THE
COLLECTION PLATE," HE STATED.

"WHY YES," SHE REPLIED, "EVERY WEEK MY SON SENDS
ME MONEY, AND I GIVE SOME
OF IT TO THE CHURCH."

THE PASTOR REPLIED, "THAT'S WONDERFUL. HOW MUCH
DOES HE SEND YOU?"

THE OLD LADY SAID, "$10,000 A WEEK."

THE PASTOR WAS AMAZED. "YOUR SON IS VERY
SUCCESSFUL; WHAT DOES HE DO FOR A
LIVING?"

"HE IS A VETERINARIAN," SHE ANSWERED.

"THAT IS AN HONORABLE PROFESSION," THE PASTOR
SAID. "WHERE DOES HE PRACTICE?"
THE OLD LADY SAID PROUDLY, "IN NEVADA. HE HAS TWO
CAT HOUSES IN LAS VEGAS AND ONE IN RENO

Unknown "Mine ~Bat~ Man" Playful - 16 years, 6 days ago
Unknown
Baptizing A Drunk

A man is stumbling through the woods totally drunk when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river.
the drunk walks into the water and subsequently bumps into the preacher. The preacher turns around and is almost
overcome by the smell of booze. Where upon he asks the drunk, 'Are you ready to find Jesus?'

'Yes I am' replies the drunk, so the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the river. He pulls him up and asks the drunk,
'Brother have you found Jesus?'

The drunk replies, 'No, I haven't.' The preacher, shocked at the answer, dunks him into the water again, but for a bit
longer this time. He pulls him out of the water and asks again, 'Have you found Jesus, my brother?'

The drunk again answers, 'No, I have not found Jesus.'
By this time the preacher is at his wits end so he dunks the drunk in the water again, but this time he holds him down
for about 30 seconds.

When the drunk begins kicking his arms and legs, the preacher pulls him up. The preacher asks the drunk again,
'For the love of God, have you found Jesus?'

The drunk wipes his eyes and catches his breath and says to the preacher,
'Are you sure this is where he fell in?'

Unknown "Mine ~Bat~ Man" Playful - 16 years, 6 days ago
Unknown
TWENTY DOLLARS

On their wedding night, the young bride
Approached her new husband and asked for
$20.00 for their first sexual encounter.
In his highly a roused state, her husband readily
agreed.

This scenario was repeated each time they made
Love, for more than 30 years, with him thinking
that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes
and other incidentals that she needed.

Arriving home around noon one day, she was surprised
to find her husband in a very drunken state.
During the next few minutes, he explained that
his employer was going through a process of corporate
downsizing, and he had been let go.
It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able
to find another position that paid anywhere near what
he'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined.

Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which
showed more than thirty years of steady deposits
and interest totaling nearly $1 million.
Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued
by the bank which were worth over $2 million,
and informed him that they were one of the
largest depositors in the bank.

She explained that for the more than three decades
she had 'charged' him for sex, these holdings had
multiplied and these were the results of her savings
and investments.

Faced with evidence of cash and investments worth
over $3 Million, her husband was so astounded he could
barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out,
'If I'd had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you all my business!'

And that's when she shot him.

You know, sometimes, men just don't know when to keep their mouths shut.

Unknown "Mine ~Bat~ Man" Playful - 16 years, 6 days ago
Unknown
Home Depot Scam Alert

A 'Heads Up' for those of us men who may be regular Home Depot
customers.

I recently became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping.

Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite
traumatic. Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to
you or your friends. Here's how the scam works.

Two seriously good-looking 20-21 year-old girls come over to your
car as you are packing your shopping into the trunk. They both
start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their
breasts almost falling out of their skimpy T-shirts.

It's impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer them a
tip, they say 'No' and instead ask you for a ride to another Home
Depot or Lowes.

You agree and they get in the back seat. On the way, they start
undressing. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and
starts crawling all over you, while the other one steals your
wallet.

I had my wallet stolen October 4th, 9th, 10th, twice on the 15th,
17th, 20th & 24th. Also November 1st, 4th, twice on the 6th,
three times just yesterday, and very likely this coming weekend.
So tell your friends to be careful.
Unknown "Mine ~Bat~ Man" Playful - 16 years, 6 days ago
1 2 Next
Comments

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Janna
sweet smile
Janna "Fabulous ღ" - 15 years, 3 months, 12 days ago
Nikita Josephine aka Nikki Jo
Came across you randomly .... loved the tales ..... may have to steal them .... lol ......
Nikita Josephine aka Nikki Jo "Cat Woman" Curious - 15 years, 4 months, 29 days ago
Alexander Graesser
random comment #272) *unhinged* You have been unhinged
Alexander Graesser "Flambeaux" gone! - 15 years, 5 months, 6 days ago
Unknown
Milord I came to touch thine pages but I see mine marker here upon the first.. *curtsies* *kigs* thine tales are also touched .. and ye have not items in thine shoppe... but I still think thee terrific...
You have been given *A big Smooch!*.
Crafted by Unknown
Unknown "Milady" Seductive - 15 years, 6 months, 15 days ago
Unknown
Hey there, great tales!
You have been given Thumbed Your Tales!.
Crafted by Beth Spidy
Unknown "~Sensation~" Cheeky - 15 years, 6 months, 24 days ago
Unknown
Happy Birthday, Chris!
You have been given Happy Birthday.
Crafted by Unknown
Unknown "Lady in the Moon" Sparkling - 15 years, 7 months, 7 days ago
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Unknown's shop
Chris' Shop

Like every one, I need points to protect my herd. lol
Updating daily.

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