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Credit Crisis Hurting Identity Thieves
Written by: Tony Moscardino
More than almost any time in recent history, grave economic concerns are forcing economies across the globe to a screeching halt. Banks are no longer lending amongst each other as they once did, foreclosures bringing an end to the dreams of thousands more Americans every single week, and soon to be retirees watch anxiously as their plans for the future evaporate as quickly as the value of their retirement funds. Threatening collections letters, notices of intent to foreclose, and overdue library book reminders are clogging the collective arteries of the postal system. As fears of global recession loom throughout developed nations across the world, many people find themselves fearing for the future of our economy. It certainly seems like doom and gloom for mainstream society, but one segment of the population is even more frightened. And they worry for a good reason.
“Imagine working full time for your company for years, battling hard to climb the corporate ladder only to watch it fall apart right under your feet.” Explains James Whitfield, who also identified himself as Larry Goggins and David Marshall “One after another dozens of my identities have become worthless because of foreclosure or late payments on their accounts. Most of the time, even if someone has good credit it’s nearly impossible for me to get an account in their name because nobody wants to lend to nobody these days. Seriously, how am I supposed to feed my kids now?”
This once lucrative business is currently experiencing the worst slump since its inception. Men and women of all ages, all across the world, are being declined their god given right of spending frivolously without regard to ever paying it back. According to one grim assessment, estimates of one in every four identity thieves can no longer afford their lifestyle. These poor souls are now subject to minimum wage jobs, sometimes even welfare just to make ends meet. Once proud citizens now hang their heads in shame as they stoop to working for a living, earning their money with blood and sweat like Average Joes.
Not everyone, however, shows sympathy for this epidemic. “You want my identity? Take It! Hell at this point you can’t do any worse than I have” Says Denver resident David Marshall (Editor’s note: Wait, where have I heard that name before?) “One even applied for 5 different cards before finally giving up, 5 of them! After I lost the house, kids, car, dog, and remote control even Capital One won’t look at my application. And you know when they won’t give you anything, you’re fucked everywhere else!”
In tight times like these, it is easy for us to become lost in our own anxieties and worries for the future. We may find ourselves barely getting by, but next time you feel down about your situation perhaps you should take a moment to consider the little guy. There are many out there less fortunate than yourself, wallowing in shame and begging for some semblance of the good old days. Sadly, without the credit you worked for years to establish they may all one day become extinct.
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