An old lady walked into a Grocery Store.

She wanted to buy the best dog food in the world for her little puppy.

She went up to the cash register to buy the food.

The sales-lady told her that the store did not allow old ladies to buy animal food unless they show the actual animal because a lot of old ladies like to eat the animal food themselves.

So the old lady went home, got her dog and went back to the store to buy her dog food.

The next day she came back to buy the best cat food around But the Saleslady told her the same thing, so the old lady went back home and brought her cat to the Grocery Store to buy the cat food.

The next day the old lady went to the Grocery Store again carrying a big container. She went up to the sales lady and said, 'Put your hand inside here'. The Saleslady shook her head. 'NO', she said, 'there is probably something in there that will bite me!' 'I promise you that there is nothing in here that will bite you'. the old lady said. So the Saleslady stuck her hand inside the container and screamed.
Unknown "*Hottie*" Naughty - 16 years, 3 months, 2 days ago

In a second grade class, a little girl asks, Teacher, can my

Mommy gets pregnant? How old is your mother, dear? Asks the teacher

Forty, She replies

Yes, dear, your mother could get pregnant.

The little girl then asks, Can my big sister get pregnant?

Well, dear, how old is your sister?

The little girl answers, Nineteen.

Oh yes, dear, your sister certainly could get pregnant.

The little girl then asks; can I get pregnant?

How old are you, dear?

The little girl answers, I'm seven years old.

No, dear, you can't get pregnant...

Then, the little boy behind the little girl gives her a poke and says,

See, I told you we had nothing to worry about!
The teacher fainted!!!

Unknown "*Hottie*" Naughty - 16 years, 3 months, 2 days ago

Menstrual cycle - very important send to all your friends.
I am sure most of you have a daughter, a granddaughter, a niece, a friend or a friend's daughter... this might be worth checking out. PASS THIS ON EVEN IF YOU DON'T USE IT!!
Recently, this past week, my cousin Nicole Dishuk (age 31... a newly graduated student with a doctoral degree about to start her new career as a Doctor...) was flown into a nearby hospital, because she passed out. They found a blood clot in her neck, and immediately took her by helicopter to the ER to operate. By the time they removed the right half of her skull to relieve the pressure on her brain the clot had spread to her brain causing severe damage. Since last Wednesday night, she was fighting for her life. They induced her into a coma to stop the blood flow and then operated 3 times. Finally, they said there was nothing left that they could do. Multiple clots in the left side of her brain were found, the swelling wouldn't stop and she was on the life support. She died at 4:30 that day. She leaves behind her husband, a 2-year old, Brandon and a 4-year old, Justin. The CAUSE of DEATH they found was a birth control she was taking that allows you to only have your period 3 X's a year. Doctors said it interrupts life's menstrual cycle, and although it is FDA approved... it shouldn't be. So to the women in my address book, I ask you to boycott this product and deal with your periods once a month, so you can live the rest of the months that life has in store for you.
Please send this to every woman you know - you may save someone's life. Remember you have a cycle for a reason.
FYI: The name of this new birth control is Lybrel. If you go to Lybrel.com you will find a least 26 pages of information regarding this drug. The second birth control is Seasonique. If you go to Seasonique.com you will find at least 43 pages of information regarding this drug. The warning and side effects regarding both pills are horrible. Please forward this to as many daughters AND sons, co-workers, friends and relatives. Several lives have already been changed.

Unknown "*Hottie*" Naughty - 16 years, 3 months, 2 days ago