Just a quick message, I'm sorry to those who have missed me over the past couple of weeks. I have not forgotten my friends here. To bring all those whom don't know up to speed I received a call from my former spouse the long and the short of our call is that my son is coming to live with me! So I've been busy trying to get myself in order and readied for him to arrive this Friday.

I promise to try be on more.
Rick Todd "Mr Poetry" Peaceful - 15 years, 9 months, 10 days ago

I don't know how many people on here listen to country music but there is a song out by Ummm I think Alan Jackson that just hit me in the face today.

Anyway I've been singing along with this song for about a year, and it;s one of those song's the just give you goose bumps. The song is about a guy who finds out he doesn't have much more time to live and how he was in his early 40's with so much more life before him and how the news of his disease changed his out look on life.

Well hell here it is December 23rd I'm pushing 40 and wouldn't you F**KING well know it, I've got a disease in my spine, that may lead to me ridiing around in a wheel chair before I brake 60. I mean I played football in high school, played on the National Fastball Team while in the Military, I've been Over Seas dodging bullets and blowing stuff up. Been out of the Service for ten years and NOW, when I should be in my prime, I find out hey this could be as good as it get?


Oh HELL NO! There is no freakin' way this Cowboy is going down without a fight! My life, is MINE! I refuse to "Go Softly into the NIGHT" I'm more of a "Ours is not to Reason why" guy. I have the memory of too many "Forgotten friends."

Now it's time for me to be the Man I should have been for my (ex)-Wife and the Father I should have been for my kids. Too many years of hiding from people because I didn't want them to know how profoundly affected I was by my experiences, I was afraid that people wouldn't want to know me if they knew some of my past history, Now I say to hell with it. I am here I am alive and I will live and whether or not I end up driving a wheel chair vise a tractor trailer is of no great significence to me.

But be advise world I WILL NOT GO DOWN WITHOUT A FIGHT!!!

You can break my body but you will NEVER AGAIN BRAKE MY SPIRIT!
Rick Todd "Mr Poetry" Peaceful - 15 years, 11 months, 8 days ago

The following is a work in progress, I wrote the first draft back on Christmas Day 1993, the day I lost my faith in the world. I was a Sailor in the Royal Canadian Navy deployed under the U.N flag to Haiti during the attempted Military Coup. Every Year since I have pulled this writing out and revised it. Now I know some people will read this and say they have seen it or a similar writing on the internet or a local paper. But I did write this in 1993 and it was published on the HMCS Providers routine orders. So I do have proof that I wrote the original draft in 1993. In 1999 or 2000 I saw another writing very similar to mine in an email that had been writen by an American serviceman while spending his Christmas over seas.

So, without much more pre-amble, this is dedicated to those who came before me, those I served with, those that came after me, and those yet to come.

It was the night before Christmas,
in some far off distant land,
I was making my rounds,
Under the stars
for a brake I did stand.

And what should I spy?
A man lay shivering, asleep
on the cold dusty ground
He let out but one faint cry,
I stood fast not making a sound,
So his slumber not to disturb.
As I stood there,
One single tear I did cry.
"Don't cry for me Sir;
This life is my choice."
Why live this way,
The ground for a bed,
And no pillow for your head?
Yet you lay sleeping still
and utterly alone....
His answer came quick
With conviction in his young voice.
"Sir I am not alone,
there are others here like me."
I could not speak, so taken was I by his decree.
"Shed no tears for me, for twice I did volunteer."
Twice? But so young he did appear.
I stood and pondered how often had he been here?
"It maybe my first tour of this land, but twice I did volunteer...
Once to join the Service of my home and native land,
Then again I did volunteer to serve the red and white in this far off distant land."
But what of your family; on this special and Holy Night?
"My Family? They are safe and warm, for they live in a Country,
Safe from hostiles' harm, My brother and Sister, to the city did move.
Mom and Dad, live still back on the farm."
Then why do you leave them, your family, back at home?
"I came here to protect them, so that they may stay free.
And those that came before me, and those that come after me, do so for the same.
We come for those who won't come, can stay home without shame.
No... No.. Cowardice is not to blame, For I live in Canada, a Country that is free,
We who serve do so by choice, we come to defend those without a voice.
Those who do not come but choose to remain, go to school or work that is their gain.
For us that do come, Protecting the Peace becomes our PAIN."

The Soldier dozed off again, But still I did remain, just to watch over him,
To Protect the Protector, Was I just being vain? Again I started to weep.
"Cry not for me! This was by MY CHOICE!
YOUR watch is over now, YOUR work here is done!
Heed my voice!
"CARRY ON SANTA, CARRY ON! FOR YOUR WORK IS NEARLY DONE!"

And to YOU PEACEKEEPER,
CARRY ON,
FOR YOUR WORK WILL NE'ER BE DONE.
Rick Todd "Mr Poetry" Peaceful - 15 years, 11 months, 12 days ago

I strikes me as odd how we are so free to chat to complete strangers here on H/P or over the net. Yet how many of us would have the nerve to strike up a conversation to these same people in a public place. Why are we so free over the net? Is it because here we sit each in the relative comforts and security of our own homes? On-line we are free to be the person we want to be. We can project ourselves in any manner we desire, explore the hidden parts of ourselves that we readily hide from the light of day or the public eye.

Some of us perhaps are exploring those parts, for other perhaps this is their/our only means of escaping the confines of our prisons. No matter how nice a house or home it still can inprison us, whether we are bound to them by means of injury or small children. Perhaps we are here to escape the bordom and mind numbing routines in our work lives.

We herre living in North America statistically work more hours for less pay and time off then our counter-parts in Europe. Perhaps we are seeking human contact even if it is thru this media, the contact that is lacking in our lives by other means.

A husband works long hours to support his family the so Wife does not need to work. She becomes bored and lonely sitting at home with no company but her children. She turns to the internet for adult companionship...

A Single Mother works long and hard to raise Her family again no monies for sitters She turns to online company....

Single Men and Women work go home tired and spent, no energy to go out, so again turn to online companionship....

Whatever the reason by whatever means, we are all here, searching, seeking that elusive contact that is lacking in our lives. As sad as this maybe I'm curious, how close to the truth I just may be?

Ricco
Rick Todd "Mr Poetry" Peaceful - 16 years, 23 days ago

Sorry this new addition has been so long and coming, but life is what it is.

Those "unknown" people with the power to decide my fate have taken me back into the fold. Dva (Department of Veterans Affairs) have taken some responsibility for my broken state. I am now in "Rehab" with them, ofcourse at this point it's only a "status" and no action is being taken however it is a start, and we all know how long it takes for any Government Agency to do anything. My applications for wage loss replacement and Pensions are still pending.......

Ricco
Rick Todd "Mr Poetry" Peaceful - 16 years, 23 days ago