You have been given A Herd of Wild Ponies. Crafted by Unknown

I just had the wierdest dream last night, you were in it...
Somehow you'd accidentally lost your virginity to me, and we both woke up in the morning together and were like "whoa, WTF?"... we'd probably been drunk or something the previous morning. Then my mother tried to take me to the Carribean with her Christian friends, and she tried to make me carry this huge harp all over the house, so I slit her throat and killed her. Then my boyfriend and I (we were both vampires) met this other really annoying vampire who was kind of a jerk.
MOST RANDOM DREAM EVER.

Why are you angry, Mr. Flavorful?

You have been given Mmmm Jelly boobs. Crafted by Whistling Dixie