Once upon a yesterday, I fell down into a dark abyss. It stank of royal shit... I didn't know what to do, but then, a little fairy landed on my shoulder and told me that if I became it's slave, that it would take me back to where I fell from. I said, "No thank-you, I rather like the dark." The fairy left. I found a candle and lit it so I could see a little. Not long after that, a lion came out of nowhere and bit me in the ass!!! Well I was so shocked I dropped the candle and it went out of course.

Now I was very frustrated, this was just plain silly, lion biting me in the ass, fairies on my shoulder. Enough was enough... So I found another candle so i could look for a way out of the cave. Then, a toaster fell upon my fragile head. Now, quite confused, and with a bump on my head, I began wandering aimlessly around the pit, cave, thing...

Soon, I ran into something... it was Satan... Satan was so terribly sad, so I sat down to console him and ask him what was wrong. "I've lost my lovely lover!" He sobbed. I patted him on the back and said, " It's alright Satan, here have a cookie." I gave satan my last sugar cookie, and began wandering aimlessly again.

Well what do you know, another toaster fell on my head. "You stupid c*nt!!!!!" I screamed, and threw the toaster at the wall. Somehow, it managed to bounce back off the wall and hit me in the face.

I then met a mighty pig, who said he knew the way out of the cave, and to climb upon his back so he could take me there. So I mounted my mighty hog and he led me to a well lit cavern filled to the brim with wild animals. They had all sorts of yummy drinks, and one nice looking ape offered me an orange. I took the orange and ran happily into the crowd of wild animals and danced my sanity away.
Unknown "Dementia" - 17 years, 3 days ago