A man was walking along a Florida beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up and rubbed it, and out popped a genie.

The genie said, "OK, You released me from the lamp, blah blah blah. This is the fourth time this month, and I'm getting a little sick of these wishes so you can forget about three... You only get one wish!"

The man sat, and thought about it for a while and said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii, but I'm scared to fly, and I get very seasick. Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?"

The genie laughed and said, "That's impossible!!!

Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete -- how much steel!! No, think of another wish."

The man said, "OK, I'll try to think of a really good wish."

Finally, he said, "I've been married and divorced four times. My wives always said that I don't care and that I'm insensitive.

So, I wish that I could understand women, know how they feel inside, and what they're thinking when they give me the silent treatment. Know why they're crying, know what they really want when they say "nothing,", know how to make them truly happy."

The genie said, "Do you want that bridge to be two lanes or four?"
Unknown "Da Geek" Frisky - 16 years, 9 months, 10 days ago

There's this man driving down a country road and he's enjoying the scenery. The man is a nature lover, wouldn't harm any wildlife, hates guns and is always supporting the National Wildlife Fund. He's driving down the road looking at the view when all of a sudden he hits something on the road. He slams on the breaks and gets out of his car to see what he hit. He looks down and sees that he ran over a small rabbit. Now, being a nature lover and stuff, he's wanting to do something for this rabbit. He's standing there looking at this rabbit, when someone pulls up behind him. The other driver asks. "What's wrong?" "I just ran over this poor rabbit", replied the driver. "Hmm, I'll go look in my van to see what I have", exclaimed the second driver. The man comes back from his van with a spray can and begins to spray the rabbit. Suddenly, the rabbit jumps up,
stares at the two men, waves at them and jumps across the road. The two men look at each other for a sec, then see the rabbit jumping back into the woods, turning around and waving again. The rabbit jumps back into the woods more, turns around and waves again. He reaches the top of a hill, turns around, waves, and jumps over to the other side. "What was that stuff!?!?" asks the first driver. "That was my hair restorer with permanent wave!"
Unknown "Da Geek" Frisky - 16 years, 10 months, 13 days ago