Two drunks were walking home along the railway tracks.
The first drunk says, "There's a hell of a lot of steps here."
The second drunk says, "I'll tell you what's worse, this hand rail is bloody low down"
Pipkins "Red's" Playful - 14 years, 5 months, 26 days ago

Doctor: "Your wife either has Alzheimer's or AIDS."
Husband: "How can we find out which?"
Doctor: "I need you to run a little experiment this weekend. Take your wife to a park and leave her there. If she finds her way home; don't fuck her."
Pipkins "Red's" Playful - 14 years, 5 months, 26 days ago