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"Life in Texas" joke
Just moved to Texas. Now this is a state that knows how to live! Beautiful, sunny days and warm, balmy evenings. Mountains and deserts blended together. What a place! Watched the sunset from a park lying on a blanket. It was beautiful. I've finally found my home. I love it here.

June 14th
Really heating up. Got to 100 today. Not a problem. Live in an air- conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun every day like this. I'm turning into a real sun worshipper.

June 30th
Had the backyard landscaped with western plants today. Lots of cactus and rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing for me. Another scorcher today, but I love it here.

July 10th
The temperature hasn't been below 100 all week. How do people get used to this kind of heat? Too bad it's not a dry heat. Getting used to it is taking longer than I expected.

July 15th
Fell asleep by the pool. Got third-degree burns over 60% of my body. Missed two days of work, what a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson though: got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this.

July 20th
I missed Tabby (our cat) sneaking into the car when I left this morning. By the time I got out to the hot car for lunch, Tabby had swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and exploded all over $2,000 worth of leather upholstery. I told the kids she ran away. The car now smells like Kibbles and shit. No more pets in this heat!

July 25th
Dry God Damn heat, my ass. Hot is hot! The home air conditioner is on the fritz, and AC repairman charged $200 just to drive by and tell me he needed to order parts.

July 30th
Been sleeping outside by the pool for three nights now. Fifteen hundred dollars in damn house payments and we can't even go inside. Why did I ever come here?

Aug 4th
One hundred and fifteen degrees. Finally got the air conditioner fixed today. It cost $500 and gets the temperature down to about 90. Stupid repairman pissed in my pool. I hate this F&%kin' state.

Aug 8th
If another wise ass cracks, "Hot enough for you today?" I'm going to tear his F*@#king throat out. Damn heat. By the time I get to work the radiator is boiling over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell like roasted F***NG Garfield!

Aug 10th
The weather report might as well be a damn recording: Hot and sunny. It's been too hot to f*ck for two damn months and the weatherman says it might really warm up next week. Doesn't it ever rain in this barren desert? Water rationing has been in effect all summer, so $1,700 worth
of cactus just dried up and blew into the #@*&$!% pool. Even a cactus can't live in this heat. What the F*ck!?

Aug 14th
Welcome to Hell! Temperature got to 123 today. Forgot to crack the window and blew the #@*&$!% windshield out of the Lincoln. The installer came to fix it and said, "Hot enough for you today?" My wife had to spend the $1,500 house payment to bail me out of jail.

Aug 30th
Worst day of the damn summer. I'm not leaving the house. The #@*&$!% monsoon rains finally came and all they did is make it muggier than hell. The Lincoln is now floating somewhere in Mexico with its new $500 windshield. That does it, we're moving back to California for some peace and quiet.

Theresa Annoyed - 10 years, 10 months, 4 days ago
Thank you Marko :)
Theresa Annoyed - 10 years, 11 months, 8 days ago
I just want to thank each and every one of you for the gifts :D I appreciated all of them very much :)
Theresa Annoyed - 10 years, 11 months, 13 days ago
Just wanted to write this tale...I entitle it...THE TALE OF POSITIVENESS! If I have a problem with people.....I from here on out, will not call them out in my tales, bash them in my tales, or write ANYTHING derogatory about ANYONE in my tales. It's one thing to be upset about something, but it's another to be immature about it. If you have a problem with someone, say it to their face! Not all over hp! With that being said, I have made a lot of wonderful friends here and will continue to do so as the year comes to a close, going on to the new year. Just want to give a little shout out to my owner, B, you're awesome! :D OH! and thank you all in advance for the Christmas presents. :D You are all so very kind and generous. :)
Theresa Annoyed - 10 years, 11 months, 25 days ago
I just want to give a personal shout out to all of my guy friends that have stuck by me no matter what. Some people here have REALLY disappointed me to the point where I can't even look at them anymore. But then I have my friends, and I would like to think that you all know who you are, that are genuine and true and remind me that there are good people still here on hp.
Theresa Annoyed - 10 years, 12 months, 2 days ago
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LadY HeatheN

:)Hey!(: You have been given :)Hey!(:.
Crafted by LadY HeatheN
LadY HeatheN "⚔️⛓⚔️" Adored - 2 years, 8 months, 12 days ago
Madame Otter
just read that Texas tale to Rob ...we nearly peed our pants laughing :)
*poke* You alive o.O ?? You have been given *poke* You alive o.O ??.
Crafted by NirvInch
Madame Otter "My 6th Profile" Feisty - 8 years, 10 months, 14 days ago

enjoy your day ♥ You have been given enjoy your day ♥.
Crafted by Saija
Paul "The Hooligan!" Cheeky - 10 years, 2 months, 3 days ago
hi Theresa :-) Hope you are doing good!
Always fun with you.. ツ You have been given Always fun with you.. ツ .
Crafted by CheeKy Lee
Paul "The Hooligan!" Cheeky - 10 years, 2 months, 3 days ago

Leaving My Pet Some Love ♥ You have been given Leaving My Pet Some Love ♥.
Crafted by Denise Rose
NirvInch "Bestie" Tear me to pieces, Skin to bone - 10 years, 5 months, 9 days ago
Chanandler Bong

licky licky You have been given licky licky.
Crafted by b6b
Chanandler Bong "MeanestGpaDad" Never nice - 10 years, 5 months, 12 days ago
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